Reply To: Aftermath from quitting smoking
Daniel WynnHi Clearingman,
Thanks very much for your post.
I appreciate your honesty, so let's deal with this systematically.
When you notice the frustration and notice that you are biting your, have you done any “clicktracking in the moment”? With the Click Tracks, you only have to try to feel the unwanted emotion while focusing on the problem/memory. When you actually do feel the emotion “in the moment”, running the Click Tracks then (or as close as possible to when you have the feeling) can be highly effective.
I appreciate that this is not always feasible, so you may wish to tap discretely and try to remember the CT tapping sequence. It is, in effect, a pattern interrupt.
When you get a chance to run the CT, you may wish to clear:
– frustration with yourself and the habits
– the “lack of control” feelings
– the feeling that it will never get any better
Remember that, with PSTEC, it all changes when you reach the tipping-point and your work so far will not have been in vain.
You possibly have some beliefs feeding into the pattern, or certainly contributing to your emotional experience.
You may believe “Change has to be hard” or simply “Change is hard.”
Think about that for a moment. Can you see how such a belief would create certain expectations and ways of being?
This is a common belief and often stops people from making changes or giving up when the going gets tough or progress seems to dip.
Isn't it as equally valid to say “some changes may seem hard, but not all changes” or “change can be hard, if you have not resolved the emotional components that help generate the behaviour” or “change can be hard, if you have beliefs about yourself and changing”?
You also mentioned things were difficult, so you may hold supporting beliefs like “life is difficult” and “nothing is simple.” Perhaps you also hold “I will never resolve this.” Check in with these.
If you have any beliefs ike those cited above, I highly recommend using Belief Blasters or PSTEC Negative to eliminate them.
With regards to PSTEC Positive, you surely won't have done yourself any harm. You are simply layering in positive suggestions and, while it is recommended that you compose these in such a way that they are plausible and compelling, other thoughts do not usually get in the way.
To flesh that out a bit, in a crisis situation (e.g. hostage negotiations, medical emergency) it is common for the person in the crisis to have all sorts of thoughts, concerns and outcomes flashing through their mind. In these situations, trained staff will often suggest basic behavioural and cognitive tasks (e.g. “Just breathe deeply”, “Everything is going to be OK”, “Just think about your friends and family” etc.)
In this example, the compounding of suggestions overrides the intrusive thoughts and often results in behavioural changes. You can do the same with PSTEC. Although it is advised that you clear the unwanted emotions first, a positive (or negative…but that is not the scope here) suggestion of change can still be accepted in ANY emotional state.
The PSTEC Positive will surely have done no harm at all, as I assume the suggestions you chose were well-intentioned and in keeping with Tim's instructions. At worst, they may require some repetition to really tip the balance. You can also layer in supporting suggestions. For some people or particular issues, one suggestion is enough. For others, repetition is key.
I hope that helps, Clearingman. Please keep us updated.
All the best,
Paul
Hi Paul,
Sorry its a late reply. Been meaning to get back to you but have been working on all the information you have pointed out, and also been a bit busy with life in general. So, I have ran all the negative beliefs you pointed out to me through the belief blasters, I have also worked on others too. I have also been using positive even more now. I have made it a bit of a routine to install 5 positive beliefs a day for the last 4-5 days. Thinking of continuing that for a couple weeks.
I got really angry with the lack of control, the feelings of not getting anywhere, and the anger and frustration towards the habits. I realised a LOT. I thought I was destructive when biting my lips, but It wasn't. Looking back i think it's a destructive habit to have. But in the moment, its actually the opposite. I would get a feeling of comradery, or a sense of unison through smoking. Like “hey, I'm your pal if you need a ciggy” and with that comes excitement, like a cigarette was something to share with someone or look forward to. So, when I bite my lips I've noticed its actually in times when I'm feeling good about things or excited about something, where obviously i would have smoked, I bite my lips instead now. I think a lot of the anger has been released about it, so I'm seeing it in a different light for what's actually happening. I still need to clear it out more, as I still find the habit annoying. But, how do I clear whats there now, I obviously don't want to remove or hinder good moments. So how do i detach the habit from the good feelings?
Also, I want to be more successful with pstec in general. I was considering getting the advanced audio package. Would that be worth getting? I just want to learn more about methods to do things or work things out. There aren't many books or anything that link into pstec (that I know of). So do you think it would be worth getting the advanced audio? or possibly any other packages? or is there anything else you could recommend doing to make the workflow more effective?
thanks for all your help paul, it really is appreciated.