Reply To: Bully in the gym

Brian Tucker

    Hi Clearingman,

    Thanks for your reply.

    Absolutely. You are being completely reasonable and, no matter what has happened in his life, you and anyone else in the gym have every right to expect respect and courtesy.

    The 2nd part of my post (in combination with what Brian suggested) is, I reckon; what will tip things for you.

    What particular behaviours and emotions are you referencing?

    Look forward to your reply,


    Hi paul,

    It's not something I completely understand, but ill explain the best I can. So in our model of reality, we have beliefs, emotions and behaviours. When we are very young we have no critical factor, so are more susceptible to suggestions. We learn them from our parents, surroundings etc in order to survive. What I'd like to know is how to address other people's emotions. Like for instance, if I see somebody getting really angry at a situation or they feel very strongly about something, it will rub off on me. That is how we learn after all, right? How do I address that?

    Here are a few examples. There are countless ways of doing it.

    When other people are I'm from now on
    When someone is
    I'm/I feel from now on
    When other people are I'm from now on

    You could also frame it in the past:

    Angry people used to bother me as I'm safe around angry people now
    Angry people used to be dangerous as I'm safe around angry people now

    You can even go at a higher level:

    The way others feel has nothing to do with me from now on
    The way other people feel is their/not my responsibility from now on

    As always, these are just some ideas. It's best to use what comes to YOUR mind to create the suggestions specific to you.