Reply To: ENRAGED by my negative belief
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Your deeply felt fear of change suggests that it stems from some incident or incidents that happened to you when you were young. Moving house, changing schools or something or things where a change really upset you. If you can recall something then it is worth trying to CT that memory in addition to my previous suggestions.
That “thing” is a part of you, so you really are raging at yourself!
Nice and polite is not required for PSTEC work, Set up your Negative statement, feel the rage, and suddenly switch to running a CT on the rage instead.
With the Positive you are not constructing anyone else's idea of success purely your own dream, pure blue sky thinking. Not as something to attain but as if you already were in that position, feeling good. It gives your sub some reason to change rather than resist it. Don't try to give up being “ill” focus on the good feelings of getting/being better. Giving up or change for no positive reason just creates more fear of an unknown future, a vacuum of emotion. Something your sub cannot deal with.
From what little you have said so far, you probably have a sense of low self worth at this time. One thing that I personally found helpful to help build self esteem was to download and listen to “Wealth of Abundance” get it for FREE from my site no email or anything required.