Reply To: How would I find Primers for this?

#24876
Paul McCabePaul McCabe
PSTEC Pro and Forum Moderator

Hi Boobinsko,

I am sorry you had that experience and for the obvious impact it has had on you.

I appreciate that, when you hear people badmouthing you, it can be especially hurtful – particularly in the circumstance you encountered.

The type of event you outlined would have likely produced a number of different feelings and even a few beliefs.  These could be fear, humiliation, sadness, anger etc. I would contend that it is worth working on each emotion individually by seeing which particular feelings the event you described (and others like it) are evoked. Problems that you have held for a long time can dissolve remarkably quickly.

With the long track for ClickTrack2015, you could do really intensive work on the event. Keep trying to feel one emotion during each session. CT down to 0. Keep at it. The time investment with PSTEC is minimal compared to the burden of holding onto disempowering beliefs and emotions.

This event happened and had a profound impact on you. It is your truth that this led to you not trusting people, but it is not THE truth that this would inherently affect all future relationships. That is the story you have constructed and, believe me, most of us have done something similar.

So much in life comes down the meaning we ascribe to events – deal with the emotions and give the event a different meaning and, in all probability, you will have a different experience.

We give meaning to events all the time, but I have found that, if we consistently challenge our assumptions, it frees up other possibilities – it is like exercising a mental muscle and it is very impactful.

From looking at what you have written, it might prove very beneficial to consider what belief you formed from this event (and ones like it). I would recommend taking your time to map this out.

Then, use PSTEC Negative.

You could see how beliefs like (Starting with “It is my belief that…”) “People can't be trusted”,  or “It is dangerous to get too involved with people” resonate with you. Say each statement out loud and see whether it FEELS true. If it feels true or uncomfortable, it's most likely you hold the belief.

As ever, you might need to make these sort of beliefs more specific to you  – tailor the language to your specific representation of this event and the people involved in it.

You may also have formed some beliefs about people in positions of trust or authority (you mention the power-tripping of some teachers you encountered). You could look at this separately.

For the type of beliefs I suggested above, you would be looking at alternative interpretations/primers that move you from the general (all people) to the specific (those people).

For example, “Maybe those people couldn't be trusted to speak respectfully about me, but it doesn't mean all people couldn't be trusted.”

Use about 4-5 Alternative Interpretation for each belief. The art is in specifically countering the belief you formed.

Then, after doing the CTs and the work with PN, you could switch to PP and suggest “People can be trusted” or “I am resilient to people's criticism.”

In summary: keep CTing, use PN and PP.

I realise I have written a lot here and I hope this helps. Please let us know how you get on.

Paul


Paul McCabe – PSTEC Master Practitioner

http://www.lifestyleforchange.com

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