Reply To: I can’t change my programming
I think i have been doing pstec wrong. so instructions are to only focus on one emotion? when i think of the problem there are many different emotions and perceptions going on at the same time like a movie which is why maybe pstec isn't releasing anything. However i cannot seem to stick with one emotion as memories pop in which make it worse and then i start to go into victim mode and blame my father and then it spirals out of control. I noticed a shift using the free click track but then it all comes back again and then i replay it and am not getting the big change in changing my perception of reality. which is why i bought the level one which is the same click track i feel because the tapping patterns are the same. i click track many times a day but i think pstec is too specific and not general enough to release lifelong programming memories and emotions. because if i have hundreds of negative memories then with pstec i have to do each one and the ones may get triggered while click tracking so then i will lose control again .
Going back to my experiences in school. i caused all of it, no one went after me but really i was the one that was awkward and totally feeling alone and unsupported which meant i could only feel fear around people and not fit in. i feel that way because my dad is lifeless, no friends doesn't talk to anyone and didn't really communicate with me and my brother the way a normal father does and because of that we both felt threatened in school by everyone else and it only got worse as time went on. for example i had to not going in school one day because everyone was going to prom and i didn't want anyone asking me about it as i didn't have any friends. while everyone in my year was at prom i was at home alone. my environment at home is completely separated from the outside world. which is why its hard to break the programming and now have a new identity . because i have gotten so used to all these negative emotions , now i don't even know what i am feeling. i dont know the word for it.
But i will now have a click track session and try to make some changes.