Fear of failure or maybe fear of success… don’t know where to start from
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leticia santosI was raised as an only child of very strict, negative, smothering parents who strangled my personality and made me believe you cannot really become whatever you want in life and need to settle for a more realistic option. I was even scared to go back home if I got less than A at school. As a result of that I went to college and pursued a degree I am not in love with, and I am scared to try something if I know the result won't be perfect. I constantly feel the need to prove myself to others and please them.
A year ago I decided that was enough and decided to live my dream whatever it takes. I always wanted to sing and so I started taking piano and voice lessons. This has totally changed my life, however I have serious issues when singing (like I somehow unconsciously clog my throat and don not let my voice to flow).
I also have serious issues in my love life. I have been in love with the same person for years now. However, I have such fear of rejection that I do everything possible to stay far away from this person, and have terrible relationships with people who want me but whom I do not really want back.
I don't know if I fear failure or success. I am even afraid to admit to myself what I really want in my life. There are lots of limiting voices in my head telling me things such as: it is too late, you will never get there, it will be too hard, you will get hurt…
I have tried with the free PSTEC packages and I got great results to the extent that it is the only way to calm me down whenever I have a panic attack (which is pretty often now that I am trying to go after what I want). However, I'd like to go deeper and start with the paying packages. I need some advice on which one to get first. Should I start with how to achieve almost anything? erasing limiting beliefs? Success and abundance? What would you recommend? Thanks so much!!Brian Tucker1. I was raised as an only child of very strict, negative, smothering parents who strangled my personality and made me believe you cannot really become whatever you want in life and need to settle for a more realistic option. I was even scared to go back home if I got less than A at school.
2. As a result of that I went to college and pursued a degree I am not in love with, and I am scared to try something if I know the result won't be perfect. I constantly feel the need to prove myself to others and please them.
3. I have serious issues when singing (like I somehow unconsciously clog my throat and don not let my voice to flow).
4. However, I have such fear of rejection
5. I do everything possible to stay far away from this person,
6. have terrible relationships with people who want me but whom I do not really want back.
7. There are lots of limiting voices in my head telling me things such as: it is too late, you will never get there, it will be too hard, you will get hurt…
8. However, I'd like to go deeper and start with the paying packages. I need some advice on which one to get first.
1,2,3,4,5,6,7 – all of these have feelings with them. Think about what the feeling is with each scenario.
How do you feel in the present moment about what your parents said and did to you as a child – What does that feel like. You may have some emotions/physical negative feelings. But below that will be a feeling. You will want to click track all of that
What was the “feeling” you had about them back then when they did all of this to you? How did you “feel” about your parents. What was the feeling what was the feeling you had about them? That is what you want to clicktrack.
When I say feeling I mean like a feeling when you visit your home town, a feeling you get at christmas time, a feeling when you run into an old friend. That is the feeling you want to go after. These may be covered up by physical emotions or physical feelings but after you clear those you will get to the “feeling”.
Same for all of these scenarios.
What feeling(s) do you have right now when you think about it three parts.
a.) How do you feel yourself or about yourselfÂ
b.) How do they make you feel?
c.) How do you feel about them?If you think about your father and different scenarios, each one comes with a different feeling about him. There is probably a general feeling but then there are different feelings you associate with him a feeling of when he was angry, frustrated, talking down to you, happy etc. Think back to those times and clicktrack the feelings you associated with him – and anyone else involved with any given experience you choose.
- Clicktrack any feeling you have about them that is associated with the scenario.
Clicktrack any feeling you have about the given scenario
Clicktrack any feeling you have about yourself
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You have a fear of rejection and intimacy. The fear of intimacy probably comes from being rejected so many times that you developed that fear of getting close to someone to protect yourself. I know these well because I had them myself, very easy to clear.
Think back to every time you were rejected, breakups and how horribly painful that was and the feeling given all three scenarios, clear them
Think back to any avoiding or pulling away from people you love or actual acts of intimacy, again the same all three scenarios, clear them.
Limiting voices – what do you feel like when you hear those – again clear it all.
As for tools, buy all the emotional clicktracks – EEF, Accelerator and 2015 tracks – I will say you can remedy 95% of this with all those clicktracks.
Remember – It is all about the feeling associated with the experience. There may or may not be physical emotions associated with those you need to clear first so you can always start there. I will say the more clicking you do the more those feelings will pop up, especially when you incorporate the tapping and relaxing accelerators heavily. More and more stuff will be revealed by your sub as you pull the layers off until you eventually have feelings from your childhood experiences it will feel as if they are happening again right now.
Hope this helps.
leticia santosIt does help a lot!! thank you very much. It is hard to get to the thoughts associated to the feelings, I feel that they “hide” from me. However, I am really determined to eliminate these fears and I will do my best with the new tools. Again thank you so much for your advice.
Brian TuckerThen think about yourself. How you feel in the worst possible scenario:
- Clicktrack any feeling you have about them that is associated with the scenario.
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