Reply To: The Anger Flush – Get started w PSTEC – Intentionally Release Anger

Good stuff, Brian.

Anger, like a lot of emotions, can indeed be a tricky one for some people to eliminate…simply because they do not want to eliminate it and therefore they will not even try. They might assume that anger is intrinsic to certain events. In some cases, anger can arise when someone feels powerless, so it is like taking away an emotional crutch.

Other times, people can get angry for physiological reasons – like lack of sleep, too much of caffeine or physical ailments. Not everyone would experience this, of course.

Other people may feel angry, but not admit to holding the emotion…as they are embarrassed about feeling angry. They might therefore repress the emotion.

Some people get rewarded when they get angry, or get a sense of emotional certainty when expressing anger. It might feel better than, say, hopelessness.

Anger can make some people stand out and it can bond them with others.

You also see a lot of this online and it is a nightly occurrence on the TV news: some “outrage” that is meant to evoke anger, and then showing people (or even groups) expressing anger. These things are positioned to trigger anger.

Then, you can get into the secondary benefits of anger. If you express anger about something, it can earn you attention or might even suggest to others that you might “care” more about an issue.  More measured, relaxed behaviour can be construed as a lack of concern.This is a subtle little virus in our western culture, I believe. You might see it when a sports team loses a game, and one of the players or coaches is lambasted for not showing enough anger. Seemingly, in this context, he who displays most anger CARES more.

It is something of a blind spot and it would not be unusual for some people to want to remove the “cause” (“he makes me angry”, “that situation makes my blood boil!”) of anger, but not the actual anger. The “cause”, however, is not really the cause. It just seems that way.

There are many dimensions to this and, as we know, PSTEC can completely eliminate these and numerous other patterns. It is just a case of ensuring that people can recognise them that anger does not really serve them.

Paul