Reply To: Adapting too quickly to the Click Tracks

Jeff Harding
PSTEC Pro and Forum Moderator

    Hi Boe,
    My other reply above applies a bit here as well, but to add…

    Now, remember what I said about running the click track on a particular issue… if it is not moving, then reassess.

    Let me emphasize…

    IF THE ISSUE IS NOT MOVING (in other words, the emotional intensity is not changing, EITHER UP OR DOWN), then reassess.

    Reassess the issue… listen for other clues from the subconscious… see if there is another angle to this… look for secondary gain (why would you NOT want to let go of this issue… what is the advantage of keeping this issue?).

    If you feel truly stuck, do not despair or give up… do not be proud… ask for help and look for a practitioner that can help you along and give you another point of view… another angle on the issue.

    Remember, not everything is apparent… definitely not logical … and much can be hidden, especially with long-term issues and old traumas.

    The sub is childlike, so treat it like a child.  Now, that does not mean “lord” over it and be use force… I know some may do that and think that's the way to get a child to “behave” and act properly …. but, I want to propose an alternative here…

    Approach it with unconditional care and acceptance.  I am avoiding the word “love” because there are far too many variations of that to be helpful.  Let's go with care and acceptance that says, 'I care about you no matter what happens… I always want the best for you not matter what you do.'

    Take that approach with your sub.

    Many times we have a barrier or issue that we MUST be rid of… we even might say something like, “I hate this… I am sick of this… I have to get rid of this!!!”
    …. well … not very caring or accepting, huh?

    So, approach this work as… well… play!  The sub loves play, but play with a purpose.  Make it fun!  Be gentle.

    I want to quote, once again, a good friend of mind here on the Big Island…

    “Self Awareness Without Self Kindness is Self Abuse.”
    Dana St. Claire

    And to quote Tim:
    (well, not sure if it's a quote, but pretty close)
    “Hard work is not effective in therapy.”