Reply To: Newbie User Hitting Plateau.
“Are you saying I should focus on the event rather than the feeling?”
It's not one or the other… it's both. Remember, while doing the best you can to keep up with the tapping to the clicks and tones, focus on TWO aspects:
1. A memory or imagined event
2. TRYING HARD to feel the feeling
“But it's often delayed, like I'll experience something and I'll be like “oh, ok” but then later on the effect of that event comes up… Because the feeling is NOT present during the event, only afterwards, when nothing abnormal is happening.”
What matters is that when you recall that experience, it's upsetting and, therefore, to find peace, you must let it go and the CT's will help you do just that.
“An example of this is I approached a girl one time and tried to get her number. She said no and I took it gracefully, fully intending to just keep going about my day.”
The reason why, quite often, is we justify the event despite our feelings. You know, we “man up”… or … “get tough” … or whatever cliche you want to use.
But, if it is upsetting, there's no avoiding it… it will come up and take control of our mind in a sense. So, it doesn't matter how you reacted at the moment of the memory. It only matters how you feel now because “now” is the only time we have to work on it… to let it go… to clear it… and the sooner the better!
… otherwise, you live like this…
” Then, after about a minute, I had intense crushing, I guess you could say a feeling of rejection, and decided to just go home, despite having errands I was in the middle of.”
“Situations like that where the actual situation caused me no stress, but only afterwards. How do you tap for that kind of thing?”
Ah, but the situation DID cause you stress and continues to wreck havoc on your life.
Don't over think this.
If you recall an experience… a memory… or something you imagine from the future or the past … and it's not J.E.E.P. … clear it! Be done with it!