Reply To: Weird permanent anxious pain in pit of stomach after CT

#23818
AvatarSeratoBeats
PSTEC User

Ok so apart from my first post ill go into detail of why I keep becoming stuck and maybe someone can tell me the best way to get through it

I'm a constant worrier. I worry about the future. I have a horrible black and white thinking style mixed with perfectionism.

This is where I continue to self sabotage and end up making myself feel like crap even though I love my life and everything is going well for me

As I CT my past failures and got rid of the feelings of failures and anxieties being with a woman ( a girl never made me feel like crap I did it to myself because of my constant self harsh judgements) and low self esteem at the time

I now am happy and accept myself even from before doing the CT.

Now this is where the issue comes into play…

I constantly have this doubt or worry that when the time comes to find a woman or go on a date with one and become intimate that I will be stressed and anxious and possibly not be able to enjoy being in the moment.

Even though the past emotions no longer effect the present I always keep thinking and obsessing about the next time ill be with a woman if ill be able to cope or how my performance will be.

I want to live life in the moment not caring what will happen and just accept whatever outcome is presented. But I find as I try to go about my day there's always the thought in my head that I have to be perfect. That I can't tolerate failure. That I have to be a great lover, satisfy her etc.

It's a ridiculous belief that there's always a pressure on me. I can't just accept the uncertainty and except “who cares”

Maybe it won't be like that when the time comes because things are different now but my dam all or nothing and perfectionist thinking hinders my ability to just live life without pressure

What is the best way to overcome this so I can just move on with my life and not have to play these scenario is out in my head every day.

This is why I'm wondering if I need to do a negative erase instead of just the positive affirmations

Again I feel 100 times better clearing the emotions of failure and anxieties of intimicy but I'm still left with this issue

Thanks again for all your time in reading this