Reply To: Aftermath from quitting smoking
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Have you tried thinking of that feeling and getting extremely angry at it and also CT any feelings of resentment towards it. In both cases they would be feelings at the problem and at yourself about the problem
Yes tried this last night and today. To be honest I started getting really fed up today. Annoyed that the click tracks weren't shifting it away. Annoyed I wouldn't let myself fully associate, and frustrated I always make things harder than they need to be. I almost felt like giving up pstec all together but instead of doing that I held onto that (the feeling of wanting to give up) feeling the best I could and I think something might have shifted a little. I sometimes find the click tracks distracting, like I can say I feel angry now, but when I run the click tracks I can't feel it like I could, like there's too much going on and Tim's voice is just there too much, distracting me from feeling bad or associating fully. Is this normal?
I also kept biting my lips again today, I really have to stop this, it's not good. Why do I keep doing it? Any ideas? I almost think I'd rather start vaping again just to see if I can stop acting this way.
I've been using pstec for a while now. Over a year maybe closer to two, I'm not sure. I've still got loads of problems, I think that I see everything as a problem? Or I'm really uncertain or maybe afraid of changing fully. I don't want to go back to who I was before I became anxious, but then I'm not sure of who I would be otherwise. I think I find comfort that going through a list and working on problems that way (one event at a time) makes it a slower pace, thus a prolonged time until I am without my problems. I also think I'm afraid to be negative, and this also makes it harder to associate with negative emotions. I tried running that through the click tracks but it didn't shift it enough or it kept coming back, I forgotten. I also like things to be a certain way, like things can't be messy, not in the physical realm but emotionally. So when I have an event to clear, I have to have that emotion be a certain way that fits my thinking, and thus it doesn't flow freely. Anger becomes more tunnel like, rather than being what it really is. It's confusing to me.
Anyways, thanks for your time and responses.