can we self heal if we are both traumatized?

Forums General Discussions and Specific Issues Confused and Not Sure Where to Start can we self heal if we are both traumatized?

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    PSTEC User

      I am so lost, and confused. I am angry, bitter, and slightly CRAZY…..i have been working on my relationship constantly, for the past 9 solid years and i don't even know who this man is… if i am to believe he loves me, after catching him in umteen lies,  then i need to talk about what happened….. my boyfriend just about completely shut down on me for 3years…..he wasn't present, he was running from every conversation with me because his guilt over how he was choosing to hurt me was too much to admit, so he just refused…. it was very hard for me…. i kicked and fought, i started a lit of things trying to get to the bottom of why we had no connection,… i hung on through that crap and then almost one year exactly ago i stopped fighting and just tried to break away. We split for about 5 months… we got back together about 7 months ago and in that time he has had a real lot of growth in seeing his behavior that hurts me but then dealing with anything causes him to shut back down again…… in the past 7 months i have dealt with about 5 new conflicts that go against everything he says he believes….. this is a horrible cycle….. i love him, but i love me too…… And my kids deserve a better situation than this……. i could justuseshine adadvice and kindness please….thank you

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