Feeling angry after session
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- September 30, 2014 at 4:23 am#21649sarah miederPSTEC User
I've had a hard time for about 10 months now in dealing with the end of a relationship. It has definitely become an obsession where I think about him all the time, and still feel like things are going to change somehow. The situation was complicated itself since he had C-PTSD, and I've had an incredibly hard time letting this go. Logically I know this is ridiculous, but I've been having such a hard time with the emotions, depression, and anxiety around this.
For the last 2 days I did several rounds of the click track, while focusing on feelings of obsession, anger, feeling like I can't be happy without him, jealousy, etc. Today I did another round, plus an EEF, and afterwards followed with PSTEC negative, and then PSTEC positive. I did find some relief for a short while today, but then pretty quickly had strong feelings of jealousy, anger, and obsessive thoughts once again. I feel like these feelings kinda came back with a vengeance, and especially the anger was pretty intense- not really a kind of anger I have had too much of before. It wasn't really an anger that I felt directed at him, but more I felt like my whole being was just angry.
I guess I'm wondering if someone can help me out with any advice in this. Is this a good sign that perhaps I've just released some surface stuff that helped me get to a deeper level that needs clearing? Should I just keep working at it, or am I doing something wrong? Suggestions for how I should be focusing on things? Thanks in advance.October 1, 2014 at 9:19 pm#23666Tim PhizackerleyPSTEC User
I tend not to post on the forum so ad to avoid stiffling duscussion but I happened to notice your post and thought I'd reply.
I also noticed that you mentioned the following:
“…feeling I can't be happy without him”. Can I suggest using PSTEC Negative on the following sentence…
“it is my belief I can't be happy without him”
Remember to prime it first with the best counter examples you can think of. I think you'll find this will move a lot.
Kind Regards, TimOctober 3, 2014 at 12:36 pm#23667requinPSTEC User
Thank you, Tim, for this helpful advice to Core, because I'm in a very similiar situation and want to get over an ex who, incidentally, has commitment problems so pulled the rug out from under me (i.e., the r'ship was going fine, no fighting no nothing and then out of nowhere he breaks up by text, and we are in our 50s).
It's been 4 months since the breakup.
I don't have a lot of hope he will return, but that's of course what I want.
I'm going to try the suggestion you make.
I'm also wondering if it's possible to simply CT away the love for a person who does not love you in return. Since CTs work on emotions, can strong [unrequited]love be eradicated?
It makes me sad to take that approach, but I will if necessary. Life goes on hold when grieving, and loving, holding on, and waiting for him to return, when it's so unlikely, is a waste of time.
requin aka kris.
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