I have a Crush

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  • #21477
    AvatarRolf Rau
    PSTEC User

    So i'm in love with this one girl and i used pstec while i was looking at some pictures of her on facebook. After 2 session the feelings were gone ! It was awesome. But today the feelings came back. What did i wrong?

    Maybe cause i don't found the root cause? Like for example when using eft it's essential to find the core issue if you want to solve a problem forever.
    I used pstec on the feelings that was triggered when i look at her pictures + on past experiences with her everytime i saw her and got butterflies in the stomach.

    #22902
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Hi rolfii
    The Free Basic Click Tracks should be used to remove negative emotions. If this “love” is merely physical attraction then it will pass, without any intervention required, if it is real Love then even if unrequited you will find the capacity to let her go, because that is an aspect of real love. As painful as it might be at the time it will become a part of you, a good part, since loving someone cannot be bad. So again no PSTEC. If on the other hand you love her, but for example you feel you cannot approach her and tell her your feelings, then here is where PSTEC can help. If for example you fear rejection, then here is a fear, a negative. If again for example you fear that you will not find the right girl for you, here again is a fear to Click on. Do not try to remove love, there is not enough of it in the world as it is.
    Peter

    #22903
    AvatarRolf Rau
    PSTEC User

    Well sry, but love is not the right term – let's call it  dependency or addiction or obsession. Like a feeling that if i don't get her i will not be happy in my life. It is for sure a negative Emotion.

    In the urban slang it is called “oneiti” ->  ” There is only one simple explanation for the term: An unhealthy romantic obsession or fixation for/on one person. This mental disease will often interfere with your ability to attract said person, due to your clingyness.”
    An unhealthy romantic obsession with a single person. Usually accompanied by un-reciprocated affection and completely unrealistic idealization of the siad person.”

    #22904
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Rolfii
    Apologies for the misinterpretation.
    I will ask Jeff to answer your question.
    Peter

    #22905
    AvatarJeff Harding
    PSTEC Pro and Forum Moderator

    Aloha rolfii … without chatting it may be tough to be specific, but here are some suggestions…

    You are almost there in terms of your thought via EFT that you have to get to the core issue, but let's define “core issue” a bit more first.  I will use the term “cause” or “source” of your feelings, thoughts, conclusions … in other words, the source of your Mind Model (MM).

    You see, we all have a MM that gives us the perception of the world.  One of the communications from your MM right now is, 'I must be with this/a girl' … or … 'I can't live without this/a girl' … or … 'I can't live comfortably without this/A girl.'

    Remember, there's always a reason why you make these decisions when they are impulsive and/or compulsive… find the cause … find the reasons … you are done with it and make conscious, free choices.

    Delve a bit deeper by asking yourself these questions:

    • This current girl… have you ever felt that way about any one else … imagine that same “obsessive” or “oneiti” you feel … when was the last time you felt that way in the past … and the time before that … and before that?
    • When was the first time you remember feeling that way in your life?
    • [/list]So, you're allowing your subconscious (sub) to communicate with you about this issue.  Let it present the related memories and thoughts as you focus in on those feelings.
      Here's another approach…

    • With those questions above, look at two common perspectives…
    • [/list]

      1. How do you feel without her… what is that feeling?  Not only name it, but feel it so you know that feeling.  That feeling is the communication from the sub that is urging you to be with her… or find a similar person to “make that feeling go away.”
      2. How do you feel with her… what is that feeling?  That feeling may be a “good” feeling… a feeling I call false-JEEP.  So, you may “think” you are excited to be with her, but it's not a feeling of excitement that you are with her, but a feeling of excitement that you found someone to help rid yourself of feeling #1.
      3. [/list]Remember… Other memories will come up.  If they do, write them down.

        DO NOT:
        Assess them,
        Judge them,
        Define them,
        Analyze them,
        DO NOT determine their relevancy… this is not logical work.

        Your issue is not with this girl… she is only the manifestation of your MM's perception.
        You have past emotional experiences, thoughts and behaviors that shape your MM … you just have to be willing to discover those through listening to the sub and then using the Click Tracks to neutralize the those non-JEEP feelings.
        Once your emotions are mostly down, then you can use PSTEC Positive (PP) in this area… if needed.  You may not need to use PP, so focus on the emotions and USE the emotions and feelings to discover the source of this in your MM.
        Malama Pono!
        Jeff
        PS Remember too, don't shoot the messenger … no, not me!  ;D … I mean your sub.  Your sub is the messenger with the data of the MM.  Let the info flow from the sub and you will know exactly what to Click Track.

    #22906
    AvatarMeghan Saunders
    PSTEC User

    Hey Jeff –

    I really liked your wording for how to approach this topic.  I know it is relevant and applies to almost any issue but. . . . I rather liked reading this response.

    Crushes seem appropriately named!

    Rolfii it's great that you are using pstec for this – I can think of a few occasions where having pstec in my past would have been a welcomed tool.  Good on you for recognizing the unhealthy for you aspect and finding a means to work through it – – – to the source!  Best to your success – meghan

    #22907
    AvatarJeff Harding
    PSTEC Pro and Forum Moderator

    Mahalo nui, Meghan … excellent point… so true … nothing that we express is ever one way. 

    We have a crush on someone, we get crushed.
    We express unconditional Love for someone …

    Well, you know the rest. :)

    Aloha ia O'Koa Pa'ulo
    When we meet in Love…We Shall Be Whole!

    Jeff

    #22908
    AvatarRolf Rau
    PSTEC User

    Thank you Jeff for the fast answer. What you say makes sense. :)
    Just today i had a tought about unconditional love! Love can never hurt, cause it's an positive Emotion. Everything else is fake.
    Let's go to another Pstec-Session !

    Greetings, Rolfii

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