Removing Happiness…

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  • #21662
    AvatarSargeMaximus
    PSTEC User

    Hi. Interesting title, I know.

    Basically, I've realized that my own tendency is to hide inside of happiness whenever I need to meet a challenge, or even to move forward in my life. If I find something is too “hard”, I'll often shrug it off and default into “well, at least I'm happy!” mode.

    This is not a lie I tell myself either, it is a state. I have literally gone weeks at a time in states of pure bliss after being unable to cope with a failure. Rather than try again, I simply “be happy” and everything is neutralized.

    Now, I would love to switch my happiness to pride, or some other driven emotion that isn't negative like anger.

    Any suggestions on how to go about this? How does one remove a positive emotional pattern?

    Thanks.

    #23750
    Avatarrirvinmoore
    PSTEC User

    It sounds like you are procrastinating, which is a result of being afraid to do something and doing everything in your power to avoid it. However, I would not recommend inflicting damage on your happiness, since happiness is the goal! (Mind you, I've considered this myself, but you might want a second opinion.)

    What you might do instead is look at your reasons for not doing XYZ and blissing out instead. You said something about failures–that's a great starting point. You probably expect X endeavor to fail and/or are terribly afraid of how unpleasant failure would be. If you can take out fears like that, you can probably start making progress again.

    #23751
    AvatarLisa
    PSTEC User

    I wish I could hide inside a bubble of happiness. Tell me how you do that Lord if I could do that I would have no problems at all. I would just live in my bubble of happiness. I'm sorry I just don't see the problem here lol. :-)

    #23752
    AvatarSargeMaximus
    PSTEC User

    I wish I could hide inside a bubble of happiness. Tell me how you do that Lord if I could do that I would have no problems at all. I would just live in my bubble of happiness. I'm sorry I just don't see the problem here lol. :-)

    Think starving to death while being completely happy and you get the idea. I like living too much to let myself die of happiness.

    I'm hoping Tim can stop by and instruct me on this, till then, I'll just stay happy. >>

    #23753
    AvatarLisa
    PSTEC User

    Starving to death?? Are you not eating? I'm sorry I didn't mean to make fun of your situation I didn't realize you weren't eating. Yes there is definitely a problem there. Is the CT not helping with your situation? Have you tried CT on the emotion of not eating or is there an emotion that you can pin point that makes you not eat?
    Again I apologize I didn't realize your situation. Hopefully Tim will come on and reply to help you out if there is anything I can do to help please let me know and again I'm so sorry.

    #23754
    Avatarrirvinmoore
    PSTEC User

    Try putting the happiness on a schedule. I've been kind of a video game addict much of my life, and I find that when I schedule time so I can play games every day, even if it's 30 minutes or an hour, that “takes care of” the day for me. My underlying fear is that I won't get a chance to play my games so I procrastinate from other stuff, so if I schedule it in, I have that guarantee that games will be played that day and my mind no longer fears that it won't happen.

    One author, Andy Shaw of “A Bug-Free Mind,” instructs and repeatedly insists (“Yes, I'm gonna keep bringing this up!”) that the first key to success is to have 15 minutes of positive thought every single day, as it will give you control of your mind, and you can start creating your life by design. All other things being equal, happiness is a powerful state, while fear is the opposite.

    One more thing: you made a remark about dying of starvation, so consider this, if only hypothetically: if you were going to die, would you prefer to die happy or would you prefer to die feeling sadness and despair?

    And if you feel bad about being happy, it's time to use PSTEC to deal with those feelings and beliefs. Obviously, you recognize that there is a problem and are addressing it. Feeling guilty or ashamed or bad about it can only slow down your progress, and may even contribute to keeping the situation “stuck,” so tap on that.

    #23755
    AvatarSargeMaximus
    PSTEC User

    Starving to death?? Are you not eating? I'm sorry I didn't mean to make fun of your situation I didn't realize you weren't eating. Yes there is definitely a problem there. Is the CT not helping with your situation? Have you tried CT on the emotion of not eating or is there an emotion that you can pin point that makes you not eat?
    Again I apologize I didn't realize your situation. Hopefully Tim will come on and reply to help you out if there is anything I can do to help please let me know and again I'm so sorry.

    Lol, you misunderstand. I'm eating fine, but when I achieve that blissful state, I just forget about food, and also see no point to do anything towards my life's aspirations because I'm 100% content and happy.

    Truly the kiss of death.

    But yeah, where's Tim? lol

    #23756
    AvatarTim Phizackerley
    PSTEC User

    As others have said, being blissful is something most people dream of but if you perceive a problem it seems to me that your emotional state is not actually the issue.

    Is it the lack of perceived functionality whilst in that state?

    If so then how about removing the belief that you can get nothing done when so happy and adding the belief that you can be productive and happy at the same time?

    In other words allow the happiness to persist but add in the ability to function very usefully in that state by working on your beliefs.

    #23757
    AvatarSargeMaximus
    PSTEC User

    As others have said, being blissful is something most people dream of but if you perceive a problem it seems to me that your emotional state is not actually the issue.

    Is it the lack of perceived functionality whilst in that state?

    If so then how about removing the belief that you can get nothing done when so happy and adding the belief that you can be productive and happy at the same time?

    In other words allow the happiness to persist but add in the ability to function very usefully in that state by working on your beliefs.

    That's a good idea, but isn't a belief about what I can accomplish irrelevant when up against the actual effects of the state? Also, there's a matter of people not taking me seriously when I'm smiles all the time. >>

    #23758
    AvatarTim Phizackerley
    PSTEC User

    I'd say that whether they do or not will most likely revolve around your own expectations. The recent forum post by Benjamin in another thread illustrates this principle perfectly. 
    By changing his own beliefs women have started treating him very differently.

    Here's a question to consider that might prove useful….
    Has anyone in the history of the world ever been taken seriously when they were happy?

    As regards tying functionality to happiness….
    One can use one state or behaviour to trigger another automatically either by means of suggestion (eg PP) or by creating a habit over time. When undertaken by design it starts with the suggestion anyway.

    The sequence of belief shifts needed would be:
    It's possible.
    I can
    I will
    When I am happy I … (Intended outcome)

    Kind Regards

    Tim

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