Where does the rejection feeling come from
Forums › General Discussions and Specific Issues › Relationships and Rejection › Where does the rejection feeling come from
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- July 12, 2011 at 7:46 pm#21368
Jeff Harding
PSTEC UserHi jeff
Thank you so much for taking time to reply to me. Very much appreciated.
Looking at my past my mum was only 19 when she had me back in 1960!
When I look at all the relationships I've had and they ended I felt deep emotional
Pain from the rejection! Even when sometimes I ended it! It was like subconsciously. I would end a relationship because of a trust issue or I was cheated on! Does all this intense pain stem from me feeling rejected as a child and and still holding onto it?Again many thanks Jeff and bless you!
Rob
July 12, 2011 at 7:47 pm#22496Jeff Harding
PSTEC Pro and Forum ModeratorHi Rob,
At some point in our experience of life, yes, we come up with a set of rules, definitions or “running programs” through the subconscious that define who we are physically and how we operate or react to the world's stimulation.
The subconscious does this automatically and begins to learn even before we are born… we take on mental aspects before we are even conscious that we are taking them on. So, the subconscious, in its child-like state does the best it can to learn and develop. But, being that it has little experience and its mentors are, well, not exactly very well qualified (ie parents, teachers, friends, society, etc.), hhhmmmm, it's no wonder we are floundering as we go here.
Ah, but we are growing consciously, albeit slowly, but time does not matter, only Life.
So, it is your job as the Conscious One to mentor your subconscious. To clear away the misconceptions… the rules and definitions that no longer apply.
For example, maybe we have a fear of speaking in front of people because at age 6, we were criticized with our effort at the time. So, the subconscious said, 'This sucks… I'm not doing that again… I will protect you.' And, there you are, your subconscious sends signals to tell you to avoid those situations.
But, think about it… you are getting adivce essentially form a 6 year old. Advice that may not apply anymore and it's your job to assess and train the subconscious… to be the big brother.
Begin by following the feelings that are not J.E.E.P. (joy, excitement, enthusiasm, peace) and follow those feelings (the communication from subconscious) as clues to the images, experiences, memories and thoughts that are unpleasant… and, clear them up. Pull out your PSTEC and neutralize them.
Find the specific perceptions of rejection that uphold the overall feeling that you are “A Person That Gets Rejected.” Keep allowing the feelings and thoughts to “bubble up” and then zap them with PSTEC.
Then, watch your feelings and state of being shift and change… it's exciting!
If I can be of help, let me know.
Aloha!
Jeff
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different response to the same question…Hi Robert,
You're always welcome … just keep letting the emotions and feelings run through… let go.
The question, “Does all this intense pain stem from me feeling rejected as a child and and still holding onto it?” … can be looked at intellectually by figuring out the “why” … or, can be done through the feelings and emotions and just let go, many times without knowing the why.
So, could it be the cause as you surmise?… sure … Maybe not?… sure.
Bottom line… doesn't matter.
What matters is that you are willing to face the feelings (by the way, you don't have to necessarily “relive” them or even remember them all; just be WILLING to face them) and then let them go.
Can you do it without PSTEC? … ppphhhfffttttt … of course, you can.
Ah, but let me ask you something…
Do you wish to do it in the most effective, effortless and accelerated manner?
Well, then, tools like PSTEC can be the answers to that.
As far as being stuck, many times, as you have listened to some of the audio stories and interviews, PSTEC can accelerate your progress
But, it does take a willingness to face them and let them go. Again, just like relationships that we talked about before… not being attached.
So, have you been holding on to those feelings and memories? Sure, but no big deal; when you are ready, let them go and accelerate it with PSTEC.
When you're really stuck, sometimes a guide, facilitator or practitioner can help as well.
Try this as a measurement of your progress…
On a scale of 0-10, 10 being the ABSOLUTE TRUTH, what is the truth to this statement…say it to yourself out loud:
“My life is one of rejection…of being rejected … sometimes no matter what I do; no matter how good or capable I am.”Or something along those lines.
You see, when you look at the past traumas, they are only traumas because with the help of memories and emotions seated in the subconscious or Lower Self, you have defined those experiences as a trauma and many of them as rejections of you as an individual.
Ok, so when you have found a Truth Statement like the one above, begin to work on it in terms of finding the reasons why that is true FOR YOU.
Ask yourself, “Why do I feel that _____________________________ (fill in the blank with the Truth Statement that you found to be highly true)?”
And/or, “What evidence do I have that it is true throughout my life?”The answers that come will be more grist for the PSTEC mill.
When you find the “nasty stuff,” you use the 0-10 rating in the other direction… pull out your PSTEC tools and when a specific issue or aspect is down to zero, check with your other Truth Statement and see how true it is.
Just keep letting go and then use your conscious mind… your conscious will, to observe the results.
Aloha, my good friend!
Jeff
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