Reply To: Newbie User Hitting Plateau.
Now let me ask you a question. The things you just said to me right there, do you believe that this is realistic? Why would you rather be able to achieve your goals and be a basket case than be happy and nothing to show for it?
Think about it. How could you be happy if you had nothing to show for it?
I don't have to think about it, the life I'm living now is a direct result of dwelling on happiness rather than personal growth. And i can tell you, all I have to show for it is my anger and frustration.
The reality in life is to be happy even if you don't meet your standards. Society tells us we have to be successful in life to happy, what is success to you? It's different to everyone. I don't know if you see the problem In just your response alone or if you catch the problem with it, but if you don't, it's the reason you aren't moving forward.
I disagree. I believe i am, for the first time in my life, moving forward. Largely because I've dumped the happiness illusion and gone for success. I know it takes time, I'm not disputing that at all.
Remember that the most successful people in life never find happiness. Yet the people who struggle the most with money end up finding happiness in love for themselves and the people around them.
Yup, had that already, I want to try the other path now, thanks.
It's great to be successful, but happiness dosnt always come from success, it comes from loving yourself no matter how much of a failure you may be. Figure yourself and lo d yourself, you'll find you'll care less when things don't go your way.
It's not about random things I cannot control, it's about practicing my own zen, something I don't expect you to understand. The very fact that you are trying to “help” in areas that would require a few hours of deep discussion tells me you're not very attuned to how deep people can be. Months ago (in my “happy” days) I would have been insulted and gotten angry in an attempt to maintain my happiness. i now realize that people like you are very common. lol
2 months I've been doing this. I was the biggest black and white and perfectionist person you'll meet lol, and I've been able to overcome most of the problems you're experiencing by first accepting I'm not perfect, I love myself even if I fail or deep down feel like a failure. It's the reason I haven't yet applied to the police force. I'm building up my self so that it makes being able to fail that much easier on me. I kinda do hope I fail because its the only thing in life that we all must go through. And if you're upset that things aren't working for you and one simple thing can derail you then you simply need to look into something so basic as love for yourself and self forgiveness. This is where I started and then targeted my perfectionism. Try purchasing a perfectionist help book that explains more in detail about it.
I'm actually doing a course called “Personal Mythology” ever heard of it?
Remember the only reality is the one in your head. “Unacceptable” as you stated to me is a word of evilness and should never have been a word placed in the dictionary.
You can hold that opinion for yourself, but when it comes to MY life, unacceptable is acceptable.
Now, does anyone want to help me with my original issue:
– Why does the CT not hold? Is it simply not targeting things specifically enough, not going deep enough, not hitting a wide enough area of experiences? What?
I appreciate any help.