PSTEC for Self-Love
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- October 18, 2015 at 6:43 pm#21789Mandeep GujralPSTEC User
I did a test and I wanted to know what you guys think.
I basically asked my mind to bring up any feeling that is stopping me from “loving myself 100% in this moment.” And then I focused on that feeling as hard as I could to keep it there and ran the click track on it. I feel lighter and more self-love. Is this a good way to do stuff in general when there is no memory present just general sad feelings? I will also try this with goals. like “mind bring up feeling that is stopping me from getting a great job, great girl, etc”
Thoughts? I am want to keep doing this daily as I think one round is not enough to clear these deep issues.October 21, 2015 at 3:05 pm#24330Peter BunyanPSTEC User
While thinking of your goal it is likely that all sorts of fears and anxieties come to mind these generate negative thoughts and reasons why you will not achieve that goal. This sabotages any progress towards that gaol or even stops it all together. So Yes! Keep on going clicking away any negative feelings and self-limiting thoughts.
PeterDecember 28, 2015 at 8:42 pm#24331LisaPSTEC User
I was really glad to see this post topic here. Surprised as well that there is only 1 post on it. Self love is a major battle for me. I feel if I truly loved myself I wouldn't continue on this negative path.
Does anyone else has this problem of loving themselves? And if so are there any tips you can give me on which tracks I should be using?
Thanks for your help in advance.December 29, 2015 at 3:32 pm#24332Peter BunyanPSTEC User
Self Love seems at first to be a difficult topic, but let me perhaps simplify it. Here I am going to stick my neck out and say that self love = high self esteem/self worth = spirituality = JEEP = happiness. The problems are all caused by how people interpret the words which come with so many different connotations. Rather than see differences I try to see what all these have in common. To me the commonalities are far bigger than any differences.
This means that the route to achieving any or all of these things is the same. This starts by removing all the negative emotions from all of your past. Although there are others since this is a PSTEC forum then the tools to use first are any of the PSTEC Click Tracks. Supporting these are Wealth of Abundance and PSTEC Negative. When progress has been made then any of the PSTEC Positive tracks can be introduced. PSTEC Accelerators help the whole process along. While working at removing the negatives you can start work on defining a goal or series of, what do you want out of life and why do you want it. You need to have a purpose in life, a reason to exist. Self love sounds almost selfish, but it is not. If you can love yourself then you can love others and they in turn will find you an awful lot easier to love. The world needs more of it!
Keep asking the questions
PeterDecember 29, 2015 at 6:45 pm#24333LisaPSTEC User
Thank you Peter for the response. As a child you were told to do for others never for myself or that would be considered selfish. It's hard to turn that around definitely need to CT that.
I have the Wealth of Abundance track and the negative tracks. I have started using the negative track and then followed up with the positive because I assumed after you erase a negative belief you need to install a new positive belief. Is this correct?
Thank you again for your helpful answer.December 29, 2015 at 9:19 pm#24334Peter BunyanPSTEC User
Self love is for one's self not for what others may think of you. Self improvement so that you can leave the world a slightly better place than when you arrived.
If you can still hear your parents sayings, where they are self limiting or unhelpful as your example then this would be a good target for PSTEC Negative.
Listen to WofA it is about gratitude which is an aspsct of self love helping to build it.
You do not need to follow the Negative with a Positive but it is a good time. If you have a belief that goes like “I'm no good at…” this is usually associated with failure at “…”. So Click Track the sense and memories of failure. Run Negative with that belief “I'm no good at…” then a Positive “I might be able to do that…” and then another Positive “I can do that. ..”. Hopefully you can see the system and alter it for your own needs.
PeterDecember 30, 2015 at 12:06 am#24335LisaPSTEC User
Thank you so much Peter! I love your definition of self love about leaving the world a better place than when I arrived.
Those are some great ideas to CT about the things my parents said, wow I could click forever on the things they said to me ha ha.
I ran one of the new 2015 ct on me being a failure today. I like the way you told me to use the positive in steps where you said “I might” then “I can” great ideas thank you!
One more question please: when I had the feeling of failure today and I started ct using 1 of the old basic tracks and I wasn't getting any relief using it so I put it up for a few then I used 1 of the new 2015 tracks and it finally eased up. So my question is, why didn't I get any positive results using the old ct but did when using the new? Could it be that my subconscious or whatever has gotten to used to the old that it's not working or could it be something else? Thank you againDecember 30, 2015 at 10:49 am#24336Peter BunyanPSTEC User
It is certainly possible to get used to the Click Tracks and it is strongly recommended to keep on swapping the tracks. You can also keep it different by tapping on different parts of your body, by using your feet instead of hands. By just using one finger, different fingers etc. Crossing arms over as in 2015. These things help break the habit patterns that build up with lots of use.
If you have the Basic, the eef's and 2015 you can experiment to see which is the most effective. It seems that the different Click Tracks work better for some things than others but I have no information as to what or how this comes to be. I can only surmise that Tim's words resonate better for different issues for different people.
PeterDecember 30, 2015 at 1:08 pm#24337LisaPSTEC User
Great thank you!February 5, 2016 at 1:50 pm#24338Paul McCabePSTEC Pro and Forum Moderator
Good topic and one that will resonate with a lot of people, I'm sure.
With regards to self-love, I think a good place to start is to ask the question “how do I KNOW I don't love myself?”
Wait for what comes up and write down the “evidence.” I highly recommend making a list in this way, as it allows things to be more clear and gives you aspects to work on. It could be negative feelings, things that have happened (or were said) in the past or situations that are happening right now.
A lot of the core self-esteem/self-concept beliefs we subconsciously hold seem to have been formed in very early childhood and around our parents or caregivers. There's been a fair amount of research into this.
To shortcut this a bit, I'd recommend looking into whether you have the beliefs “I'm not loveable” or “I'm not worth loving.” There are probably other beliefs at the root of this, but try those, or see if you hold something similar.
You may intellectually dismiss having such beliefs, or feel uncomfortable about the prospect of holding them. That's normal.
A good way to check whether you hold any belief is to say the belief out loud. If it holds any charge/resonance, you most likely hold the belief. You can also test this by contrasting the feeling of saying something absurd like “I'm a Martian” or “I'm 8 feet tall.”
So, if you find that you hold the belief, I'd recommend going back to the source of it. I've found that this is highly effective. A belief like “I'm not loveable” would typically be formed when parents withdrew their love from us, or if they were critical of us. You could look back at your childhood experiences and see how that holds up for you and capture the essence of what was happening at that stage of your life.
I'd recommend Click Tracking every experience where you didn't feel loved or that you weren't worth loving. Every single one that you can find – going right back to the original source.
Then, I'd suggest using PSTEC Negative on the beliefs “My belief is that I'm not loveable/worth loving” (try these separately).
I'd suggest that, instead of writing 4 counterexamples of how you're loveable/worth loving now, you write 4 counterexamples of the events in childhood. That's when you would have formed such a belief.
To make this more clear, you most probably formed a concept of yourself in childhood. Perhaps your parents were strict or you got the sense they were withdrawing from you when you did something they didn't like. Perhaps you formed the belief because your parents were not there as much as you needed them to be, or one of your parents left the household when you were young. These are just possible scenarios, of course.
Once you've established the source, write four counterexamples. For example, if the belief was formed due to a parent not being around too much, a counterexample might be “Dad just needed to work hard and wasn't around as much as I wanted. It didn't mean I wasn't loveable.” If it was because you were criticised by your parents, a good counterexample would be “I am loveable, but my parents didn't have the skills to show me that when I was young.”
After you find four counterexamples, I'd recommend using the PSTEC Negative track to linguistically deconstruct the belief.
After you've done that, check for any more evidence of “I'm not loveable.” Do the events that provided the “evidence” for “I'm not loveable” still have the same emotional charge? If there's ANY emotion, Click Track it down to 0 or, to put it another way, until you can view the events and feel no emotion at all. It may take a few rounds and I'd personally recommend, if you are doing a few rounds of click tracking, to mix up the tracks.
After doing this, the separate uses of PSTEC Positive on “I'm worth loving” and “I love and accept myself completely” are likely to give you a huge emotional boost, as you'd have eradicated the limiting belief, the emotional charge around all the events that “evidenced” the belief and have given your mind a suggestion for how you wish to feel in future.
I hope this is clear. If not, please let me know.
Paul McCabe – PSTEC Master Practitioner
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