Women, Rejection and Beauty

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  • #22002
    AvatarTruman
    PSTEC User

    I supposse this is a very common theme.

    I am under the illussion that the more beautiful women are, the more probable is that they're not going to be interested in me.

    Which becomes a self fulfilling belief

    Also I get the sense that women choose men based on what is his possition in any given social hierarchy of dominance.

    I feel like an outsider and I get continuous evidence that women seem to be interested in leaders of men in small groups or men that are admired in any given social group. Not in men outside social hierarchies (because this ideal of batman or clint eastwood seem to be a fantasy).

    I don't think the last one is an illusion since we're social creatures and women still pick and select mates up and across dominance hierarchies.

    Sometimes I hate women for that (because i've never been succesful in dominance hierarchies of men, that's why i became an outsider), which makes me resentful and betrayed and wanting to fuck women just to get a sense of revenge (for being rejected all these years by the women i like) this is very toxic and only attracts me towards narcissistic and manipulative women.

    Betrayed because i lack hope that women have their own individuality and naturally they're going to follow what's in their best natural interests (the man nearest the top of the dominance hierarchy). Also I get continuous evidence for this shit.

    How can I change my situation?

    #25636
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Hi Truman – Something is going on with my ability to post long blocks of text on the forum. Here are some high-level thoughts where you can start. You might consider working with a PSTEC practitioner. http://pstecregister.com

    I supposse this is a very common theme.

    I am under the illussion that the more beautiful women are, the more probable is that they're not going to be interested in me.

    Which becomes a self fulfilling belief

    Imagine this in a worst case scenario with the most beautiful woman you can imagine rejecting you and then clicktrack until gone.

    Another more powerful approach would be to imagine the above along with any times this has happened to you in the past as far back as you can remember while you run the 2015 wrapper track. So this way you have a nice history + worse case future event. Wrap it all up into one big bundle and clicktrack it until gone.

    Also I get the sense that women choose men based on what is his possition in any given social hierarchy of dominance.


    Clicktrack this feeling – again worse case scenario you can imagine as if the woman has actually done this to you.

    I feel like an outsider and I get continuous evidence that women seem to be interested in leaders of men in small groups or men that are admired in any given social group. Not in men outside social hierarchies (because this ideal of batman or clint eastwood seem to be a fantasy).


    Slow this all down and clicktrack each piece of it. Again using the worse case imagined scenario as if it's happened.

    #25637
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    I don't think the last one is an illusion since we're social creatures and women still pick and select mates up and across dominance hierarchies.

    Sometimes I hate women for that (because i've never been succesful in dominance hierarchies of men, that's why i became an outsider), which makes me resentful and betrayed and wanting to fuck women just to get a sense of revenge (for being rejected all these years by the women i like) this is very toxic and only attracts me towards narcissistic and manipulative women.

    You have many different feelings here and a lot going on here – I would start with anger and hatred towards woman. Also that you do not feel safe around women, that you can't trust them. Then resentful, betrayed, revenge, rejection.

    Also consider this. You are subconsciously seeking narcissistic and manipulative women due to someone in your family (female) and/or the first one or two women you were in a relationship with having these types of behaviors. It's not that they are maniuplating you, they are just doing what is normal to them. They can't see any of this unconscious programming of theirs. Your programming however pulls you right into it and keeps you in pain. It is a secret addiction of which you are realizing more details as you progress with becoming more conscious and aware of what is going on inside of you. (Your thoughts, feelings, behaviors)

    #25638
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    It sounds like you have some deeper programming going on here. I would suggest you take some big steps back first and look at your mother/father and/or lack thereof. I'm taking a wild guess here (don't like to assume) but i suspect there are some things going on from your childhood at the core here. Were your parents divorced, what was the story with your mom/dad/stepmom/stepdad and/or lack of any parents etc. Did you have a controlling mother and a passive father (or absent father either emotionally or physically) Then you would want to look at your past relationships.

    Betrayed because i lack hope that women have their own individuality and naturally they're going to follow what's in their best natural interests (the man nearest the top of the dominance hierarchy). Also I get continuous evidence for this shit.

    Again slow this all down and CT each piece.

    How can I change my situation?

    I also get the feeling you could have some extensive “codependent” (thoughts, feelings, behaviours) programming including passivity, avoiding, rejection, abandonment etc. Look there as well.

    Clearing any feelings of anger, rage, hatred, resentment, betrayal, frustration and impatience – especially towards women – can give you some tremendous relief. I would again suggest looking back as far as you can remember here, starting with your parent(s).

    #25639
    AvatarTruman
    PSTEC User

    It sounds like you have some deeper programming going on here. I would suggest you take some big steps back first and look at your mother/father and/or lack thereof. I'm taking a wild guess here (don't like to assume) but i suspect there are some things going on from your childhood at the core here. Were your parents divorced, what was the story with your mom/dad/stepmom/stepdad and/or lack of any parents etc. Did you have a controlling mother and a passive father (or absent father either emotionally or physically) Then you would want to look at your past relationships.

    Betrayed because i lack hope that women have their own individuality and naturally they're going to follow what's in their best natural interests (the man nearest the top of the dominance hierarchy). Also I get continuous evidence for this shit.

    Again slow this all down and CT each piece.

    How can I change my situation?

    I also get the feeling you could have some extensive “codependent” (thoughts, feelings, behaviours) programming including passivity, avoiding, rejection, abandonment etc. Look there as well.

    Clearing any feelings of anger, rage, hatred, resentment, betrayal, frustration and impatience – especially towards women – can give you some tremendous relief. I would again suggest looking back as far as you can remember here, starting with your parent(s).

    Yes.

    Most of what you mentioned is true.

    Over bearing codependent mother that made me extremely dependent on people.

    Abscent, passive and avoiding father that was totally disconnected from his feelings.

    I can't help to be both ways, my inner emotional guidance only knows both paths.

    I don't know what healthy is on an experiential level.

    This made me an outsider and rejected a lot by people, a loser.

    And trying to be any other way just feels fake. Not being codependent on people feels like an act and people pickup on that. Like if I don't be codependent or avoidant I am overcompensating. It's a lose lose situation and a living nightmare.

    I try to tap on these things but my capacity to generate emotions thru visualization is 3/10 compared to real life experiences.

    #25640
    AvatarEamon Doherty
    PSTEC User

    Hi Truman/guy's I've been experimenting with the havening technique recently alongside pstec, perhaps you could try this to see if it works any better for you. Usually I do both back to back Google or YouTube havening technique watch example videos then try it for yourself. Brian I'd be interested in your thoughts on this but I'm currently doing this technique while planting new positive beliefs and playing pstec positive in the background I could be either nuts ? or really onto something I'm finding it very good so far. ✌️

    #25641
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Yes.

    Most of what you mentioned is true.

    Over bearing codependent mother that made me extremely dependent on people.

    Abscent, passive and avoiding father that was totally disconnected from his feelings.

    I can't help to be both ways, my inner emotional guidance only knows both paths.

    I don't know what healthy is on an experiential level.

    This made me an outsider and rejected a lot by people, a loser.

    And trying to be any other way just feels fake. Not being codependent on people feels like an act and people pickup on that. Like if I don't be codependent or avoidant I am overcompensating. It's a lose lose situation and a living nightmare.

    I try to tap on these things but my capacity to generate emotions thru visualization is 3/10 compared to real life experiences.

    Ok Truman – this is great, what clicktracks do you have besides the free basic tracks?

    Let us know so I might suggest some ways for you to get focused.

    “I don't know what healthy is on an experiential level.”
    This is the beauty of PSTEC. You don't have to know anything IMO. It's all about what you feel and what you want. If you don't like what is in your present model of reality and/or it does not feel JEEP to you then it is fair game to clear it out. I can assure you that your model of reality will change to match it once it's gone within you.

    Over bearing codependent mother that made me extremely dependent on people. Abscent, passive and avoiding father that was totally disconnected from his feelings.

    I had the same. I would say my stepmother was narcissistic, high control with OCD and my father was dependent with narcissistic programming in there. Completely emotionally unaware, invalidated etc. and as a kid how could I know any of this? I wasn't aware of this sort of stuff. This was just how it was growing up. There wasn't anything different. It just was.

    This is normal in society though the undesired model of reality and behaviors you developed as a result are playing more extensively in your present reality than you are conscionsly aware of. And that's ok. What matters is that you are aware you want change within and have the desire and drive to do so. You are doing it.

    As far as codependent/narcissitic, borderline, avoidant, OCD etc. I tend not to give much attention to these lables. Why? I find people can be a hybrid of these various “personality disorders” and so I do not look at them as any types of labeled disorder. That's how the medical world looks at it and tries to explain it.

    It's all a big ball of programming wired in us to protect us and/or recreate our past to keep us safe.

    From my alternative viewpoint, they are normal to the person who has them, they have lived this way all their life as a subconscions means to protect themselves. They don't see these things as good or bad because they really can't see them at all. To them they are normal. To an outsider who doesn't have them they seem abnormal. The same goes for everyone. We all have various aspects of these “disorders” running in us to protect us form the past. Repressed anger, unresolved emotional trauma, passivity, fears of of criticism, rejection, abandonment etc. and all sorts of various ego needs are completely normal for everyone.

    #25642
    Avatardavidh
    PSTEC User

    Awesome advice and coaching here Brian!

    Truman I Highly recommend you invest a bit in any tools you can too that Brian recommends Truman. Pstec is a godsend when you dial it in. It's a more complex system than most, because it has to be to deal with more complex issues as well.

    I consider it a nuclear system for clearing past issues and reprogramming compared to other self-releasing and subconscious reprogramming systems out there. It does take work but what doesn't? The bang for your buck, especially in terms of time and effort for the results it produces is incredible!

    Its the best out there I've seen, period. Tim is a freaking genius.

    Stick with it man you can do this.

    #25643
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Its the best out there I've seen, period. Tim is a freaking genius.

    Understatement of 2018 :)

    #25644
    AvatarTruman
    PSTEC User

    Yes.

    Most of what you mentioned is true.

    Over bearing codependent mother that made me extremely dependent on people.

    Abscent, passive and avoiding father that was totally disconnected from his feelings.

    I can't help to be both ways, my inner emotional guidance only knows both paths.

    I don't know what healthy is on an experiential level.

    This made me an outsider and rejected a lot by people, a loser.

    And trying to be any other way just feels fake. Not being codependent on people feels like an act and people pickup on that. Like if I don't be codependent or avoidant I am overcompensating. It's a lose lose situation and a living nightmare.

    I try to tap on these things but my capacity to generate emotions thru visualization is 3/10 compared to real life experiences.

    Ok Truman – this is great, what clicktracks do you have besides the free basic tracks?

    Let us know so I might suggest some ways for you to get focused.

    “I don't know what healthy is on an experiential level.”
    This is the beauty of PSTEC. You don't have to know anything IMO. It's all about what you feel and what you want. If you don't like what is in your present model of reality and/or it does not feel JEEP to you then it is fair game to clear it out. I can assure you that your model of reality will change to match it once it's gone within you.

    Over bearing codependent mother that made me extremely dependent on people. Abscent, passive and avoiding father that was totally disconnected from his feelings.

    I had the same. I would say my stepmother was narcissistic, high control with OCD and my father was dependent with narcissistic programming in there. Completely emotionally unaware, invalidated etc. and as a kid how could I know any of this? I wasn't aware of this sort of stuff. This is normal in society though the undesired model of reality and behaviors you have developed as a result are playing more extensively in your present reality than you are conscionsly aware of. And that's ok. What matters is that you are aware you want change within and have the desire and drive to do so. You are doing it.

    As far as codependent/narcissitic, borderline, avoidant, OCD etc. I tend not to give much attention to these lables. Why? I find people can be a hybrid of these various “personality disorders” and so I do not look at them as any types of labeled disorder. It's all a big ball of programming wired in us to protect us and/or recreate our past to keep us safe. From my alternative viewpoint, they are normal to the person who has them, they have lived this way all their life as a subconscions means to protect themselves. They don't see these things as good or bad because they really can't see them at all. To them they are normal. To an outsider who doesn't have them they seem abnormal. The same goes for everyone. We all have various aspects of these “disorders” running in us to protect us form the past. Repressed anger, unresolved emotional trauma, passivity, fears of of criticism, rejection, abandonment etc. and all sorts of various ego needs are completely normal for everyone.

    I do have Clicktracks2015, Belief blasters and Positive PSTec,

    I've been dealing with this issue since 4 years ago, first learning pickup and social skills and then self help and spirituality, but nothing except PSTec seemed to do the work. Meanwhile I see guys who did absolutely no work on self discovery and self awareness that I did over these years getting more social success with men and women than I could dream of.

    Well, I suposse that's the arbitrary nature of being raised on different kind of families.

    Do i have to clean the entire emotion until it stops coming back or it will regenerate if I don't clean it completely?

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