Approach Anxiety

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  • #24790
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Hi math

    You absolutely did not partly fail, you most certainly did partly succeed! That is something worth celebrating!  :)  If you can take one step in the right direction, you can take another and another and at some point get to your destination. At present you are still on the journey.

    This may seem like small difference, but it is crucial. If you expect failure that is what you will get. On the other hand if you expect success than it is at least likely to happen. Everything that you have been doing so far with PSTEC has really been aimed at just this difference, being positive.

    You use Click Tracks to remove those feelings which stop you doing what you want to do, so…
    Imagine approaching an attractive woman and feel that wall, that resistance and Click Track it. Relive that sense of frustration and Click Track it.

    It would be great if PSTEC worked really quickly for everyone and everything, but sadly this is not possible as everyone has different issues and is different. That sense of wanting the problem to be gone, now, that desire is also something to be click tracked. You want the success, but the sense of urgency for it to happen is counterproductive. This can lead to a sense of failure like that which you have recently experienced instead of being happy at achieving some progress.

    You are doing fine, keep on clicking!
    Peter

    #24791
    Avatarmath341c
    PSTEC User

    Hello Peter

    Yes you are right!
    I just feel frustrated when i hear, that some people on forums said that they did 4 sessions of EFT tapping and they could approach women without problems, just like magic.

    But yes you are right we have different problems, beliefs. It is strange that it is so hard, because on the other side nothing dangerous can actually can happen.

    I don't give up, i will keep click tracking! :)

    Thanks for all you help again :)

    #24792
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Math

    You can of course use EFT as well as PSTEC it is more portable as it does not require any hardware or kit. Like PSTEC, EFT requires you to be “in touch with your feelings” so that you can focus on it while you tap. You can talk through the issue to your self before running and during a Click Track in a simialr way to the set-up statement before going round and while  tapping the points. “This resistance stopping me from….” “This wall I feel when approaching women…”

    NB I'm not an EFT therapist although I have used it for myself in the past.
    Peter

    #24793
    Avatarmath341c
    PSTEC User

    Hello Peter.

    No, no. I wont use it, because it did not helped me. As i said on another reply, the EFT would remove the feelings for 15 min, and then they will all come back, i don't know why  :)

    I will continue to click track.

    I have one question.

    Are click tracks supposed only to remove feelings from thoughts, so you are able to change the beliefs in real life, or they also remove beliefs?

    Because there is a product here that is called “Negative belief releaser”, so i guess it's actually for beliefs?

    Thanks again for all you help so far!

    Regards Math.

    #24794
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Hi Math

    Apologies I had forgotton but my replies are also for others to read, so I do often repeat things over a period of time.

    Yes the Click Tracks remove negative feelings from memories or anticipated future events. This weakens beliefs,by sort of removing the foundations, but beliefs reinforced by many incidents which appear to back up the belief take on a life of their own. These beliefs which have been  repeated over so many times can be removed with PSTEC Negative. So if when approaching strangers you find yourself saying things to yourself like “I always get anxious” I can't do this” then these would be good targets for Negative. To me a belief is a habit of thought, a string of words that are said automatically in response to some trigger situation.  Beliefs are in language but the trigger is likely to be feelings.

    Peter

    #24795
    Avatarmath341c
    PSTEC User

    Hello Peter.

    You don't need to apologize.

    If think the core problem is my beliefs. I have some underlying beliefs. The problem is not my self esteem, because i actually believe that i am good enough to approach people. The problem is that im afraid of other people. The more people i need to approach, and the more people are in the area. The stronger my anxiety is, and excuses will pop up in my head. Like no, people will look at me, i will draw atention. I care too much about what others will think of me. Someone standing completely alone on the street is very easy to approach and i have began to talk to the person without big problems. But onvce it is crowded it's gets so harder.

    I will click track, and imagine my self where people look at me when i approach.

    Regards Math

    #24796
    Avatarmath341c
    PSTEC User

    Hello Peter.

    Update!

    I see there is some process, with im happy with!

    After Click tracking for a very long time, i have been able to approach guys in bus, and get to know them, talking to staff at my fitness center without fear, the last few days. Small talk with guys at fitness, giving questions :)

    However there was an attractive woman i almost approached that sat down, i really wanted to talk to her. I almost approached her, i was few steps from her. But when i wanted that, i felt fear spreading in my whole body, and again i felt that wall blocking me.

    It is really strange, because when i get in that fear state, i don't remember what i thought, and i ask many questions my self, why i did not acted. tec.

    I will keep trying!

    Thanks for help agian!

    Regards Math.

    #24797
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Hi math

    Recall that latest incident and Click Track it! Soon!
    Peter

    #24798
    Avatarmath341c
    PSTEC User

    Hello Peter

    I do! Right away.

    Regards Math.

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