Fear of confrontation – Help needed – My Journey with PSTEC
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Brian TuckerIt's been about another week since my last post, today my level of internal calmness and thinking is just amazing. I have used the cascade tracks to take out some major fear.
It seems like after I finally the anger down pretty far by clicking the anger and listening to the various anger tracks for a few weeks including the new “no more anger” track.
More about my use of anger tracks here: http://pstecforum.com/pf/tell-us-about-your-pstec-story/anger-packages/msg3325/#msg3325
All of a sudden, here came some very large feelings of fear. Some of these feelings of fear I would even go so far as to say they were associated with extreme flight fear, almost felt like terror.
As I took each one out with the cascade release track, the next one would pop up a few hours later, slightly different in a different way with different thoughts and slightly different forms and feelings of fear. I would then take that next area out as it came in. It was as if my mind was just throwing wherever fear it had left as a last resort because that was the only fear program it had left to serve up.
It is to the point with the cascade track on the last several sessions, I can just use it to immediately remove a given type of emotion – like just cutting that out of me like a surgeon – because the thoughts and feelings have seem to become so isolated as the other layers that masked it have been removed. Not only that, but because I am so calm and focused, there is no urgency or need to even want to remove it other than it is just annoying and does not feel JEEP.
I feel absolutely grounded, the thoughts I have are just empowered and I feel like a completely different person. I even have people commenting – some of which I have known my whole life and some I barely know – on how calm I am. There is definitely an an adjustment to this new way of being.
I have decided a few days ago to purchase and run the “stop smoking” package. I have already started the process and I will leave an update in that section of the forum soon.
Brian TuckerBeen 20 days since my last post. I have being running PSTEC emotional clicktracks a few hours a day. I have also been running the “no more anger” package along with a few anger related packages for 30 days now.
Since I have been running the anger tracks, it seems that the anger has diminished considerably in all aspects of my life. As a result of this, it seems to have revealed the true “feelings” fear etc that they have been protecting me from. This weekend I spent two days @ 6 hours a day running PSTEC on these various feelings. I went through a very painful first day as it seems so many emotions that have been swirling around in me for several weeks, suddenly came and hit me all at once, but the first day I just kept going and going until it was all “gone”. At this point, I was emotionally numb. I even felt as if I was having symptoms of being physically sick. I kept reminding myself that regardless of what was happening to me, it was not real and that I was on the verge of a massive breakthrough. That night it all came back so strong it work me up though I was able to hold on for a few hours until such time I was able to spend a several hours working on all of it again.
These feelings seemed to be what was under the fear that kept moving through my body. I will say that they all were associated with rejection that I experienced nearly a year ago to the date. It seems my body created a conditioning of anger to protect me from all of it and once the anger was cleared through the use of the other tracks, I was able to feel the true feelings that were in so many similar but different flavors.
All I can say is, today everything that I was concerned or worried about in my life has no meaning to me and does not affect me or influence me in any way on so many emotional levels I can't even list it out. All of the 40+ items which I have been working on for the last two weeks has collapsed all at once and the result is wild.
There are no words to describe how powerful this feels to have a conversation at work, with my kids or other people and have ZERO negative emotions involved to influence the experience. People say things that are purely literal to me, I have full power to give it whatever meaning I want with zero ego influencing me with negative self meaning.
I will share that when I first was looking for something like PSTEC, I had this thought of finding some sort of “tool” that could make a person emotionally resilient, along the lines of some top secret DoD tool that could be used to create a warrior without emotions.
I'm here to report that I always believed that PSTEC could do something like this in a good way, and it has taken me to a place of which all I can say to anyone is keep going, you will eventually get there and once you do, you will be in a place words cannot describe.I can feel the change. I feel like a completely different person. My family and friends commented on how they have noticed a massive change in me.
I never imagined the emotional clicktracks alone could produce such a profound result. This is just awesome and though I see a few little cookie crumbs to sweep up, I am moving ahead with other small things as they come to me.
Keep going!
Paul McCabeHi Plus1g,
It is fantastic that you have gotten such profound results by using the PSTEC tools consistently, creatively and regularly. I believe you have mapped this out very elegantly for others.
I get the impression that you have experienced some profound spiritual shifts with PSTEC. It is, from my own experience, an important and unadvertised bonus of using PSTEC. I must admit that I also never intentionally set out for spiritual growth, but I definitely feel I have experienced that too.
I am confident that your progress has inspired many people who have been lucky enough to read about the progress you have made and the tremendous growth you have experienced in your sense of self-worth and, if you will, oneness. That is an amazing blessing for you and your loved ones.
I really enjoy reading your contributions and am delighted for you. Thank you.
Paul
Paul McCabe – PSTEC Master Practitioner
http://www.lifestyleforchange.com
Please contact me anytime if you want any assistance in utilising PSTEC to help you live a life of tremendous freedom & possibility.
Recreate yourself with PSTEC.
Skype, Zoom, in-person & phone sessions available…
Brian TuckerLast night I had some more feelings of rejection/fear lingering in my body from the weekend. I began patiently working on them for about two hours with the various emotional clicktracks
This morning, the true feelings were revealed and so I again started working on clearing them. After about an hour, again a long list of similar feelings from some events last year came in and I just kept following them as they changed, brought in corresponding thoughts and cleared.
Just about the time they were all cleared, the feeling and image in my mind suddenly changed to that of my first serious girlfriend in high school @ 30 years ago. Again a very distinct feeling with her having many variations. I continued again through the cycle of clearing which took about 90 minutes until there was nothing left to clear.
At this time, all of a sudden an image of my father came in and the distinct feeling that I have of my father along with more variations of this feeling than I could comprehend. It took me about 90 minutes to clear all of these various feelings with all of the past events.
It seems as if though I moved through the rejection and fear events that occurred in my existing relationship a year ago, down to the the original layer in my first real relationship and then to the original layers of rejection and fear from my father.
It is interesting to note as I cleared all of the feelings and thoughts from my first relationship, I was amazed at how strong the feelings were even 30 years later and the level of recall associated with them. On top of this, it was amazing how I realized the pattern of all the events that happened back then – even insignificant events – being identical to the events and feelings happening that I was clearing in my existing relationship.
Also the thoughts and feelings with my father, really cool that many of these events were 40+ years ago as if I was right back there.
As I was clearing all I could think of was how long I have been carrying all this baggage and how wonderful life will be without it.
About two hours later I had a similar type of feeling that comes with memories from my stepmother who was a very destructive person in my life. I cleared that too in about two runs of the tracks.
Really feel like I hit the jackpot today, excited for this all to shake out!
Brian TuckerHi Plus1g,
It is fantastic that you have gotten such profound results by using the PSTEC tools consistently, creatively and regularly. I believe you have mapped this out very elegantly for others.
I get the impression that you have experienced some profound spiritual shifts with PSTEC. It is, from my own experience, an important and unadvertised bonus of using PSTEC. I must admit that I also never intentionally set out for spiritual growth, but I definitely feel I have experienced that too.
I am confident that your progress has inspired many people who have been lucky enough to read about the progress you have made and the tremendous growth you have experienced in your sense of self-worth and, if you will, oneness. That is an amazing blessing for you and your loved ones.
I really enjoy reading your contributions and am delighted for you. Thank you.
Paul
Paul I started on a spiritual journey a year ago. Part of this journey was to find a way (tool) to remove limiting beliefs and childhood programs causing me a great deal of pain and so here is PSTEC.
This and the effects on energy and vibration are the best kept secret of PSTEC. Knowing what I do now, I would have approached using the tools in a much different way however, as I continue to really get sharp with them I intend to share a process I have thought out once I get into the right place myself.
I have to admit the “no more anger” track came at just the right time as it has helped me leap ahead much easier and faster than I would have without it.
Brian TuckerAlright so a week later so many big chunks have come off.
I had a fear of intimacy – a feeling of pulling away when my spouse or kids want to hug me or get close to me – hey and as I was doing it here comes all sorts of feelings form past relationships – this is now all gone.
I had a block, sort of like procrastination to get some things done. I started working on that and out of nowhere what comes up, distinct feelings from every job change and every chaotic living arrangement I experienced between 18 and 30 years old. It felt like a tugged on a strong and the whole sweater came unraveled!
I had about 10 different forms of anger, resentment etc all gone. – I started with original thoughts and they all at some point turned into old feelings from my stepmother with one of them turning into a big rejection and argument with a friend about 15 years ago. As soon as they cleared I was stricken with fear and anxiety, I just kept clicktracking away on that until it was all gone. I suspect this has all been revealed as a result of getting clear and listening to no more anger now for 5 weeks, not sure but it's all gone.
I had some major rejection and abandonment “pain” from all old brakeups, a few specific ones – all of that is now gone
I had fear running all through my stomach that was difficult to pinpoint. I would just work away on it spot by spot a little bit every day and I would say most of it is gone, a few little blips here and there but I will take care of it as it pops up.
I am at the point now where I am no longer removing anything to reactively stop pain. Instead, I am just going through life and removing things as they are revealed to me because I feel awesome and I know that with every one I remove I feel that much better!
I will also say it's taking me less time to remove even the big stuff now. after I get really into a session for an hour or so, some feelings come up and they will melt away in a matter of seconds. Seems like my sub is finally at the point where it's really soft and accepting of change.
More to come.
Brian TuckerSince my last post I have been running the emotional click tracks about 3 hours a day on anything that comes up.
I am not sure if this is by design but for some time now, it seems as if the tracks are showing me any negative programs that can be removed BEFORE the experience happens. Can anyone verify of this is intentional? It's as if I think about something that is going to happen and my sub says hey that will be great but you may want to remove this negative program before you have that experience. I of course do and wow what a difference.
Can anyone tell me if this is by design?
I had a meeting coming up with a person who is very confrontational. When I meet with this person they can be a real jerk which in the past of course can make me feel/act like a jerk. Now we all know what is really going on here subconsciously.I am sending this out and I am getting it back in the mirror though I can't see it.
I thought to myself, hey wouldn't it be cool if when I met with him I could not think, feel, behave or even want to have any energy to be a jerk. How could I avoid that? I thought about me being a jerk and the feelings – physical energies in me and the energies I perceive in him that come with that.
So I started click tracking on that…
As I did that, I realized there are about 20 different forms of feelings/energies in me with the various ways I can be a jerk (you may also refer to this as being a “dick”) to someone whether it be a potential confrontation, a situation with my spouse, the kids, whatever – the energy behind my physical emphasis, tone of voice etc. I just figured what the heck I will just clear them all. I was amazed that when I did this, every single one reverted back to my dad and grandfather having the exact same jerkiness, energy to me and every scenario when they were this way to me that resulted in me picking it up from them. The feelings were just as fresh as when they happened nearly 30 years ago. I also realized while going along a lot of it was me to my spouse which turned into memories from my dad being a jerk to my mother, I also clicktracked those. I further clicktracked the feeling that I associated with the other person(s) when they perceive I am being a jerk and furthermore when my kids are being a jerk to me, what is the feeling I associate with them.
Naturally after it was all cleared I felt completely different and could not recreate any of that jerkiness in me if I wanted to.
I went to my meeting, hey the guy was completely different, no jerkiness anymore. Now what is really cool is the immediate change I saw in my three daughters. They are completely different around me now. I have not experienced such an immediate and profound change in people around me in the hundreds of hours I have been using the clicktracks. My kids have changed drastically towards me as I have moved along my journey but NOTHING like this, it was an overnight transformation in myself and of course in them. I am no longer transmitting this subconsciously in any capacity.
I also noticed that while when clicktracking, all of the jerkiness thoughts and feelings towards my spouse changed into my father being jerky to my mom and my grandfather being jerky to my grandmother. It just goes to show we are programmed exactly what we see as kids. That is what we are. Even though I have done extensive work to consciously let go and forgive, I think you can see that there are many programs that still exist that when removed can make an immediate and profound difference in what you see in the mirror.
I also had an experience yesterday – I need to go to the tailor to buy some new suits. Every time I go there I have a strange certain feeling associated with that. I realized that the clicktracks revealed this to me and it is a feeling of “not good enough” I started to clicktrack on this and here came hundreds of similar not good enough experiences and feelings throughout my whole life – work, relationship, money etc. as if they were happening right now again.
I also have done a lot of clicktracking here in the last few weeks and nearly every situation in my relationship reverts back to memories and feelings from my father /mom and/or stepmom and grandfather/grandmother and how they treated each other and also tons of experiences from when my parents went through their divorce that had feelings that are exactly under the feelings I have right now and have been having for over a year, specifically fear, guilt and shame. These have nothing to do with me and my current reality other than they are all energies I picked up from my dad when he went through divorce. So many energies that my dad had that were placed on him by my stepmother that I picked up and carried all these years through all my relationships. All of that is gone. There were so many what I could consider small things I had no idea that were so insignificant I would never have thought of in a million years but they are all behind everything. I also had some other dark things brought to my mind – large patterns I would never have thought to clear – that were behind some of my more powerful negative feelings. I also see exactly how my relationships have most all mirrored my father and stepmothers relationship down to my/their patterns and behaviors and also how my subconscious has always been seeking an exact match for my stepmother so that I can be in the same programs as my father. It’s an rather awakening and mindblowing experience to say the least.
I am just astonished by what you can do with these emotional clicktracks alone. To be able to proactively go in and completely and permanently remove any negative day to day behavior from your model of reality is unlimited power. There are no words to describe what this is like and the uses are limitless. Just think about the subtle energies that are behind you project with different ways you talk, anger, frustration, fear, guilt, you name it. Even if you think you don’t have any negative emotions, there are so many energies behind what you project it is just wild. I have done so with all of these types of feelings and things just change more every day for me in all aspects f my life. Imagine proactively removing these from your life and what you see in the mirror altogether, permanently.
Paul McCabeHi Plus1g,
Absolutely superb posts and insights. I wish there was a “like” button!
I think the PSTEC tracks are crafted in such a way that they help us both weaken beliefs and identify patterns of behaviour and thought.
It does not surprise me that you are getting these effects, as I believe it is a natural by-product of immersing yourself in this type of work. Immersion makes all the difference. You are reprogramming yourself.
I think that what is happening is that, as you strip away the unwanted patterns, the “real you” emerges. It is the “you” that you know exists, as you probably had a sense of it at certain peak moments of your life, but could not elicit consistently. To be able to strip away the BS and experience yourself and other people the way you have is a true blessing.
The work you are doing is changing your experience of life and the people in it. And people pick up on that. It has resonance. Max Planck said “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” You are living that!
I have noticed similar experiences myself. Essentially, the effort in separating feelings from events and also using Tim's various modalities can only help to heighten sensory acuity, as well as being anle to cut ourselves some slack and being more forgiving of and empathetic to others.
Too many little irritations or unwanted emotions we experience in life are suppressed or explained away as “normal.” If you eliminate all irritations, even the “normal” ones that “everyone experiences”, the positive benefits accumulate…and you end up getting annoyed about very little. And then you work.on THAT!
Like you mention, that really is unlimited power. You are literally creating your experience of life.
It is a fantastic vibe and people seem to respond well to it. I am excited to discover where this path leads you.
Paul
Paul McCabe – PSTEC Master Practitioner
http://www.lifestyleforchange.com
Please contact me anytime if you want any assistance in utilising PSTEC to help you live a life of tremendous freedom & possibility.
Recreate yourself with PSTEC.
Skype, Zoom, in-person & phone sessions available…
Brian TuckerPaul this is such exciting stuff. I just keep going because with every one I remove it just gets better and better.
Today I had a strange feeling about myself so I decided to click on it. Four hours later I had cleared hundreds of experiences and feelings from about a 15 year period in my life. Another big chunk in this was more experiences than I could possibly count from an old girlfriend and a painful 5 year relationship we had. It is amazing how real it was and the volume of what we retain and carry around with us years and years later. We think we are consciously past it but in reality, all we are doing is developing an emotional conditioning to block it out. It just sweeps it under the rug and gets bigger and bigger over time.
This process continues to surprise and amaze me around every corner at the things you would never give second thought to that just come out of nowhere. Like I say it's like pulling on a string and all of a sudden here it all comes. An emotional enema it all just pours out. Once that was all out it was just amazing how much better I felt.
A part of you says at what point do you stop. But it's as if I have replaced the habit of ego giving me the drug of feeling bad with the habit of self removing ego to feel good. What more could you ask for.
One might think 2-3 hours a day of clicktracks in a day is extreme but I compare it to training for a marathon. Difference is this is training your mind for the marathon of life. Better part is if you stop you don't go back the other way as this is permanent change. There have been a few days where I have ran clicktracks 6 hours a few days in a row.
I think the only thing I could ask for is a new, stronger version of the accelerator tracks. I do use them a lot, often I start with two sometimes more accelerator track runs and then a few of the various clicktracks and then two more accelerators. Seems to help and bring it all out. Stuff just comes into my mind out of nowhere and never would have imagined why any of that would need to be cleared but hey, when in Rome.
Brian TuckerPaul I will also add that I have mentioned earlier some strong side effects from the clearing at times. I'm pretty sure these are àll part of my ego “dying” and it can be very strong and “scary”. It's important to remind ourselves that this is emotions and everything is fine in the present moment. The best thing to do is not fight it and just relax and allow what is happening. Or “just go with it” as Tim says and tell yourself you are safe in the present moment.
There have been several times this has awakened me in the middle of the night and a few times I actually pulled out the clicktracks to help myself. It really does either give you very strong panic/anxiety emotions and even at times such a swirling strong mess it does feel feel like you are physically sick or a part of you is dying. For a while some of this came with very strong negative ego self talk and thoughts but that is pretty much gone now.
The best part of this though is that when it passes I feel that much better and it seems the worse these are the better the result. It's like an exorcism!
I also experience ear ringing and blurred vision at times which can be symptoms of a spiritual awakening. Regardless, I feel amazing and become more stable every day.
Loving life!
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