Fear of confrontation – Help needed – My Journey with PSTEC

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  • #24543
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Update – Day 12

    Yesterday late afternoon was a bit difficult for me. I felt as if some negativity and depression was trying to grab a hold of me and I was more tired than I have been in a while. What I notice is that this happens every so often. What I attribute this to is my subconscious reshuffling. I always look at it as a good thing because once it passes I feel even better than I did before. So I always take it as a good sign.

    Last night I went to bed at @ 10:30 and this morning, slept solid and I woke up again at 5:30 ready to rock with no alarm clock. When I woke up, I went downstairs, drank a double espresso and then came upstairs and listened to Positive Empowered and also added in the free “Embracing Change” Hypno tracks afterwards. I plan to add the “Making A Positive Change” track to Positive Empowered every day as I had already commited for the next three weeks with Positive Empowered. So I am going to do these as soon as I wake up as I have a tendency to fall asleep during Tim's hypno tracks very easily.

    I am taking the day off from removing beliefs (school is out and I am on dad duty) but will pick up again tomorrow.

    Last night I was only able to clear “I am disorganized” and replace it with “I am organized” I can say today that if I try to believe that, recall it, or whatever it's like a distant fog in the background – like my brain is confused or fried on it. Again I have to think about the phrase and if I ask myself if I believe it, it's like a cloudy “blah” thought as if it just has no real meaning as it pertains to me. I also have an energy charge to do work unlike I have had in several months.

    So to reiterate, I am removing each belief with PSTEC negative 3x and then running PSTEC Positive on the counter positive belief 4x in a row. I will do this on at least 2 beliefs daily. This is also combined with PSTEC Empowered, Embracing Change and the finally the long accelerator track at bedtime. I am doing my negative/positive runs at night time. I also have a 15 minute meditation I do in the afternoon at lunch time.

    More to come…

    #24544
    Paul McCabePaul McCabe
    PSTEC Pro and Forum Moderator

    Hi plus1g,

    With beliefs like you've identified such as “I'm a procrastionator”, you've taken a set of behaviours and added it to your character. You've made it part of your identity, in other words. You've given a name to a set of behaviours. You've defined a part of YOU based on some feelings and behaviours.

    In many ways, most beliefs are “limiting” (they are just broad generalisations about people, ourselves and life). However, with something like “I'm a procrastinator”, you're not giving yourself any slack. To start to “loosen the grip” of a belief like this, you might consider which things you put off.

    Your obvious dedication to improving your life and the routine you've developed with PSTEC, as well as your very inspiring updates, would suggest you are anything BUT a procrastinator.

    However, I do appreciate that procrastination forms part of your self-concept. So, working on the literal emotions you feel before putting off certain activities might be highly useful. If you no longer feel inclined to put off certain tasks and just do them, it is probable that “I'm a procrastinator” would go away on its own. It's one of those “chicken or egg” scenarios, but that's my hypothesis. You can test it that way.

    I can see both sides of the “perfect” argument. In reality, perfection (but then does “good enough”?) doesn't exist, but I believe it's how we “hold” the word. What meaning do we give to “perfect”? Is it a pursuit of the impossible? Or is it just wanting to be the best conceivable version of us?

    For me, “perfect” can be used colloquially and I hold it as “as good as it could possibly be.” My “perfect” day would probably be entirely different to yours or Peter's, but we'd know what each of us mean. Like all of these words and phrases, they all mean different things to different people.

    The use of negatives will depend on the context. The absolute opposite of “there's something wrong with me” is “there's not something wrong with me”, but I would suggest the sub would struggle with that. It is quite a clumsy phrase. I would have no issues with “there's nothing wrong with me” (a compliment that was given to people where I was from!), but it is vital that you get the words that pack the most meaning and impact for you.

    Ultimately, this is all about how we want (or don't want) to feel and behave. It can be quite time-consuming, but I have found that considering what emotional and behavioural impact eliminating certain beliefs and conditionings, whilst taking on others, would have on my experience of life. I think this is definitely worth bearing in mind.


    Paul McCabe – PSTEC Master Practitioner

    http://www.lifestyleforchange.com

    Please contact me anytime if you want any assistance in utilising PSTEC to help you live a life of tremendous freedom & possibility.

    Recreate yourself with PSTEC.

    Skype, Zoom, in-person & phone sessions available…

    #24545
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Hi plus1g,

    With beliefs like you've identified such as “I'm a procrastionator”, you've taken a set of behaviours and added it to your character. You've made it part of your identity, in other words. You've given a name to a set of behaviours. You've defined a part of YOU based on some feelings and behaviours.

    In many ways, most beliefs are “limiting” (they are just broad generalisations about people, ourselves and life). However, with something like “I'm a procrastinator”, you're not giving yourself any slack. To start to “loosen the grip” of a belief like this, you might consider which things you put off.

    Your obvious dedication to improving your life and the routine you've developed with PSTEC, as well as your very inspiring updates, would suggest you are anything BUT a procrastinator.

    However, I do appreciate that procrastination forms part of your self-concept. So, working on the literal emotions you feel before putting off certain activities might be highly useful. If you no longer feel inclined to put off certain tasks and just do them, it is probable that “I'm a procrastinator” would go away on its own. It's one of those “chicken or egg” scenarios, but that's my hypothesis. You can test it that way.

    I can see both sides of the “perfect” argument. In reality, perfection (but then does “good enough”?) doesn't exist, but I believe it's how we “hold” the word. What meaning do we give to “perfect”? Is it a pursuit of the impossible? Or is it just wanting to be the best conceivable version of us?

    For me, “perfect” can be used colloquially and I hold it as “as good as it could possibly be.” My “perfect” day would probably be entirely different to yours or Peter's, but we'd know what each of us mean. Like all of these words and phrases, they all mean different things to different people.

    The use of negatives will depend on the context. The absolute opposite of “there's something wrong with me” is “there's not something wrong with me”, but I would suggest the sub would struggle with that. It is quite a clumsy phrase. I would have no issues with “there's nothing wrong with me” (a compliment that was given to people where I was from!), but it is vital that you get the words that pack the most meaning and impact for you.

    Ultimately, this is all about how we want (or don't want) to feel and behave. It can be quite time-consuming, but I have found that considering what emotional and behavioural impact eliminating certain beliefs and conditionings, whilst taking on others, would have on my experience of life. I think this is definitely worth bearing in mind.

    Paul – Priceless post! Thank you guys for all of your guidance. Today I am feeling GREAT because of all of this.

    #24546
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Update – Day 13 – Negative Belief Elimination Process Day 3:

    Today I felt fantastic – Slept last night for 5.5 hours. Woke up again in the morning charged and ready to go no alarm clock. Felt great all day.

    Cleared these beliefs using 3x negative and 4 x positive extra power

    I am not loved
    I am lazy
    I am a procrastinator
    People are judging me

    As I cleared the first two I had a very happy feeling about halfway through the second run of removing the negative. As I loaded in “I am loved” I realized how powerful an the unlimited uses of the positive tracks. Having the ability to permanently program in an “I am” affirmation is awesome. For my success, thought I imagined everyone I could think of being kind and loving to me and myself beaming with love and joy. Then it dawned on me what I was doing was programming in the new subconscious belief and the image in my mind to run forever.

    The second two did not seem as distant as the first two when I finished the negative track runs but about an hour later they became more distant as the changes started to kick in. I find this quite consistent. I definitely felt lighter as I cleared “I am a procrastinator”  I will let these two settle for a day or two and if I still feel a need to go back to them I will. I also am going to add “people are talking about me” to negative removal list if it still comes back up with the original “people are judging me”

    This total time took @ 4 hours to run by the time I created my papers to read from. Another little trick I added in was to place a rubberband on my slow tap hand as I alternated through each run so I could keep my taps straight. It was quite a long session

    I am signing off now and going to listen to the relaxing accelerator. So total today including the hypnotic tracks and relaxing accelerator was about 5.5 hours. I plan to keep going throughout the weekend on the rest of my list. My positive awareness is becoming more clear by the day in rather large shifts in perception. More tomorrow.

    #24547
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Update – Day 14 – Negative Belief Elimination Process Day 4:

    Woke up for a few minutes in the middle of the night and had a scrambled head – a little cloudy. Went right back to sleep and woke up again in same shape @ 5 hrs of sleep all good – consistently feeling great on this much sleep. I have not operated this well in my life, ever.

    The work I did last night is taking shape. Those phrases are but a distant mess in my head that I have to think about a bit. It seems like three runs of the negative ct on each belief (though time consuming) is quite effective.

    Plan today to delete 4 more on my list:

    I am different
    I am a fraud
    I’m worthless
    I am a failure

    I have also made a minor adjustment to the CT recordings and skip past the brief  instructions on each one and get right to the right hand/left hand instructions and go. This may not seem like a lot but over the course of running 12x negative and 16 extra positive, this can remove nearly 30 minutes from the process.

    Started on the first two and noticed again as I got halfway through the second run on “I am different” I got light, airy and happy/smiling as if there was some kind of release.

    Could just be me but I feel this on certain beliefs when removing them – as you can see in earlier posts. Is this a result of releasing the belief?

    Took a break for about 90 minutes and came back to do the second two.

    As I got halfway through the first run on “I am not worthless” (which was what my father used to jokingly call me as a kid) I became very clear and relaxed, almost as if something released. I moved to the next one “I am a failure” and it happened again even a little more. Also noticed as I was doing “failure” I was thinking about a current situation in my mind with respect to what would be perceived as failure and in a group of people “judging me” (from last night's run) and had thoughts similar to (without getting into detail) “I am not the victim here, I am a success” so I feel like something definitely released and/or shifted there.

    As far as how I feel, today's sessions were a breeze, I do not have any of the fatigue as I had when I finished last night and I feel pretty clear and present (comparatively speaking) perhaps my subconscious is “getting in shape” and becoming used to the work that's being done on it.

    Tonight I plan to listen to the mindfulness audio. I Googled it and found the page for it.

    #24548
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Hi plus1

    Don't forget if you feel any time pressure,stress or need to rush, then this needs Click Tracking. You are on a journey of self discovery! Now you know how to use the tools and how effective they are, you know you can get to any desired destination by working your way through eliminating any negative self limiting beliefs that stop you and re-enforcing the positives to speed your way.
    Jeff would say something like “be kind to yourself”.

    Peter

    #24549
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Hi plus1

    Don't forget if you feel any time pressure,stress or need to rush, then this needs Click Tracking.

    Peter

    There is no urgency or excess importance involved in this effort. I am simply on a course of self-discovery, determined to eliminate negative thoughts and feelings from my life and committed to doing the work – which is worth it given the result. Why wouldn't we want to invest several hours a day for a month or two taking ourselves to unprecedented levels of great thoughts and feelings? The faster I go, the better I think and feel and the better others think and feel when they are around me.  :)

    Also to your point about the beliefs “I am lazy” and “I am a procrastinator” I have removed. You are correct in stating that I am anything but that. I have been “manually overcompensating” for those thoughts and feelings all my adult life which has added undue stress to my world. I have been racing to prove that belief wrong to myself and imaginary judgement of others when in fact it is all just nonsense. Now that I have been this far in the PSTEC process, my awareness has been raised and I now see that I am in no way a procrastinator and/or lazy in any capacity. The only person who somewhat thought that was me. Now I don't think it at all! I can work at the pace I normally do but not have any guilt when I slow down a bit or take a break because I am not a procrastinator and I am not lazy.  ;)

    #24550
    AvatarBrian Tucker
    PSTEC User

    Update – Day 15 – Negative Belief Elimination Process Day 5:

    Woke up same today.

    I spent the morning going through the mindfulness training and I will say it was worth it. I had already been through every audio tutorial for each package Tim offers 2x each. The mindfulness is another very clear way of looking at the tools and I now have a complete understanding of every tool, how it can be used and the creative ways it can be applied inside and out.

    I plan to stack a lot more positives after I get through these.

    Question #1: How many runs of PSTEC Positive Extra are necessary for programming in each positive statement?

    Has anyone combined the use of Tapping Accelerator with PSTEC Positive Extra and would it be beneficial.

    I am interested to know what the most efficient and effective tool combo would be to load in positive statements.

    Question #2: On the counter pump priming statements, do we have to write those on a piece of paper and read from the paper? or can we read it aloud from a computer screen? I have all of my work in a spreadsheet and it would definitely save me steps.

    Today's belief removal includes:

    I'm not important
    I'm not worthy
    I am a fake

    =============
    OK – I got through the first two and erased them in only two runs. Either they were weak or it's just taking me less work now to clear them if my subconscious is loosening up. I started smiling near the end of the first run on both of them.

    Hi plus1

    Don't forget if you feel any time pressure,stress or need to rush, then this needs Click Tracking. You are on a journey of self discovery! Now you know how to use the tools and how effective they are, you know you can get to any desired destination by working your way through eliminating any negative self limiting beliefs that stop you and re-enforcing the positives to speed your way.
    Jeff would say something like “be kind to yourself”.

    Peter

    After I finished “I'm not worthy” something really hit me. I had this feeling I get when I am trying to help someone or I am trying to fix something. I was actually thinking of helping someone and I had the thought (which I do often) “I have to stop obsessively thinking I need to help other people fix their problems and focus on mine”.  It's like a racing thought with anxious, overwhelming feeling that screams “urgency” and “I want to get this figured out and fixed”. This is something I have had all my life when tinkering with electronics, computers, helping friends with projects or when I have a lot of loose ends on my list of things to do and they just don't click right. It's as if I have some belief “I have to fix it” “I can fix it” “I can figure it out” “I can prove it works” or something like that.

    I took all of these past thoughts in my imagination, ran upstairs and ran a wrapper on them. Then I ran 2 medium 2015 tracks and it was still pretty strong, probably 8/10. Moved to the 2015 long and got it down to about a 4/10. More events kept popping in my head as I went through that track and I added them in the mix. Then I ran the long track one more time and some childhood memories appeared in my mind of similar fashion, tinkering on stuff, going to the arcade to play video games and being in a hurry etc. I rolled that into the last round as well and shifted my focus there. By the time I got through that second long track it was what I would rate a 1/10 (most people would say it's gone)  and rather than go again I thought I would run the medium relaxing accelerator to finish up the session and see how it goes in a few days. This is so awesome how this came through the side door as part of the process because I have always been annoyed by this thinking and feeling! It must have been deeply rooted because it took 90 minutes straight to clear even with 2015.

    The good news is this somewhat maps back to Peter's comment about urgency though it was not related to the work I was doing with PSTEC directly. I though man I have wanted to get rid of this forever I am going to do it now while it is fresh and I can somewhat recreate it.

    If anyone has idea what beliefs might be causing this based on my description that would be fantastic. I thought about doing a negative on something like “It is my belief I have to fix everything” or “It is my belief I have to fix things”

    Interested to hear your thoughts…  Great progress today – tomorrow is a new day.

    #24551
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Hi plus1

    Re Q1: How long is a piece of string? It depends on how much you already believe the statement you are using. If you already fully believe it then you do not need Positive, if after saying out loud prior to running the track you immediately feel “that would be nice but it is unlikely to happen” , then it is probably a step too far. It needs to be pitched just out of reach almost there so that it “really could happen”. Also you need to be able to imagine it being true, if you cannot then it won't happen. These will give you the minimum number of play thoughs.

    Because everyone is different with different issues there is no standard way of using PSTEC tools. What combination of Click Tracks, Negative, Positive, and Accelerators will work better for some than others and with different problems. Some level of experimentation is usually required.

    Re Q2: I using computer written statements works for you good! Hand writing gives some extra connection between your mind and the statement, how this works I confess I do not know. Like reading it out loud rather than silently in your head you are adding some extra connection. Possibly these are adding extra sensory connections, using sound, vision and touch. You could possibly use colored pens or text to throw in a bit more emphasis.

    Re your desire to help others by fixing things: Not a totally bad thing unless it stems from a need to be liked or subservience. That is you feel compelled to do these from some desire to build your level of self esteem/worth by doing so. Helping others because you have the skills and a sense of community and friendship, well we could probably all do with more of that. This is not about motives but feelings and emotions. The former re-enforces your sense of low self esteem/worth and the latter increases self esteem/worth. Do you feel good about yourself when you have helped or helping others or something not so good?

    Peter

    #24552
    AvatarPeter Bunyan
    PSTEC User

    Hi All

    Anyone not know what the PSTEC and Mindfulness thing is about then click HERE it is a long tutorial and a “must have” for anyone who wants to understand how their mind works and using PSTEC tools. Get it while it is still FREE!

    Peter

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